Allison/Max

if you’re in lion, STAY IN LION

If you’re in line to see Barbie STAY IN LINE!!!

TBH putting a chandelier over a toilet should count as a whole additional crime

Today was the day Donald trump finally became president

Yeah I intermittent fast. I put food inter my mittens fast and eat it

So tired of hypocrisy in Hollywood

@bstaffin @AnomalousMuffin I regret using Twitter again

@allbalik @AnomalousMuffin and from that website, this absolute gem of a quote

Has anyone ever said “no, I don’t like this” after a waiter opens a bottle of wine and pours some for them to sample? What happened next?!

wow, another wooden ball. would it kill avocado makers to put a different toy in there.

Not a lot of people know this, but if you press down on all 3 pedals when playing the piano, it takes a screenshot.

Look its 8 dollar im gonna give to u Mr. Spaceships just kidding it is my BUTT

Meet the ‘elite’ couples breeding to save mankind

I had the incredible privilege of being invited to talk on @youaregoodpod with @alexsteed and 'You're Wrong About's' @Remember_Sarah about Ever After, and it just so happens to be the 25th anniversary of that movie too! Here is a drawing of Danielle I did over the weekend

[youth pastor voice] you know who else was arrested the week before Easter?

listen, id never hurt my cat. but sometimes, i wish i could turn into a cat so we could square up

@greasefire_ Wow what a nice chair, I feel influenced to buy one now

woweee here's my SICK new SECRETLAB 𝒸𝒽𝒶𝒾𝓇 that i am PUBLICLY posting on twitter to extend my warranty a few extra years this makes me feel totally in control of my own destiny and choices thanks #Secretlab !!!!! (is this a #promotion? an #ad? will i get sued? hopefully)