Andrew Muçhina

No words needed. ❤️

@Lady_Ella042 @FabrizioRomano Aptly put. 😆😆😆

@FabrizioRomano "When I fight and win the war, I won't go about telling anyone. But there shall be signs"

🫂 Mikel Arteta and Julián Álvarez at full time.

@omwanza 😆😆😆 piercing.

Eye contact🤣

@danymiles Always.

@WashiraX I love your nuggets of wisdom. Please, keep them coming.

Follow me, - To gain tax knowledge every morning.

KRA has refused to let Java House go. You definitely know Java House. Me, I first encountered it in 2015 while hunting for an attachment in the streets of Nairobi. All along, I thought it was a biig college teaching Java coding. With branches in every corner. Until my boss asked to meet me there. I rushed thinking the legend had enrolled for classes. Only for him to order coffee for me. Since then, it has been my favourite coffee joint. Buana ushamba iheshimiwe. Now, In 2012, the two founders of Java House had made their kill after running the company for 13 straight years since 1999. It was time to go to the beach. They sold the company to ECP Africa in Mauritius. There was no capital gains tax in Kenya then. So the boys left with their money KRA free. Before ECP bought the company, they knew: - Kenya changes laws very fast. - If they bought shares directly in Kenya - And later sold them - They could face taxes if laws changed So they got smart. They set up a shell company in Mauritius. Called it Java House Mauritius Limited. This company is the one that bought Java House Kenya. So we now have: - ECP Africa (Mauritius) owning - Java House Mauritius - Which owns Java House Kenya Clean stuff. Time came to cash out. ECP Africa remembered it was also owned by ECP fund in Washington DC. And ECP DC had a subsidiary management company in Kenya called ECP Kenya Limited. They agreed and tasked ECP Kenya to: - To study Java house and improve the business to make more valuable on behalf of ECP Africa. - Decide when to sell it - Find a buyer - Negotiate the deal In short, ECP Kenya was managing the entire investment. As all this was happening, they are unaware of one dangerous sentence chilling quietly in Kenyan tax law. It reads: • Any company managed and controlled from Kenya is a Kenyan resident company. In 2017, ECP Africa sold Java house Mauritius company to a Dubai mogul for $100M. - About 10B shillings. Everything happened in Mauritius. No shares moved in Kenya to trigger anything. • Deal is closed. 0 tax. Bahati mbaya, KRA caught wind that Java is gone. KRA immediately embarked on a fault finding mission. And in 2022, found that: - The entire transaction was managed from Kenya - Through ECP Kenya They invoked the one dangerous sentence. You remember it? • Any company managed and controlled from Kenya is Kenyan company. KRA said: • This deal is Kenyan • Tax must be paid in Kenya Tax demanded: 2.5B ECP Kenya to pay it. ECP Kenya ran to the tax appeal tribunal. Tribunal sided with KRA. ECP Kenya ran to the High Court. They judge looked at the case and asked KRA why it behaved like a bitter ex. KRA responded: My Lord, imagine educating your wife, then akigraduate she leaves you for a man of her class. How would you feel? Judge akakubali inauma. ECP wakaambiwa walipe tax. Case closed. Lesson. • Structure your offshore deal properly. • Or KRA will structure it for you.

It disappoints me how the NBA refs consistently get baited by SGA to call fouls his way. When will they ever learn? @OfficialNBARefs @NBA

@Deejay_Michez Umeweza leo, chief! @C_Kiarie The music was on fire!

😆😆😆😆

Mogeni J: You are so emotionally entangled in the matter. Please as counsel, from the way you are talking, divorce yourself from the matter & relax. As you say you're a relative to the parties, but here you are a counsel on record Counsel: Facts will not change even if you take us to mediation 😂😂

Lu Dort is a very dirty player.

🚨| WATCH: Speed says Kenya amazed him the most, with over 30,000 fans showing up just to see him in the city 🇰🇪🔥

@OdiwuorKorimbas That's very thoughtful of you!

For those joining KSL next year, lemme dump a few google drive folders we put together in our year: DRIVE 1- (MKO): drive.google.com/drive/folders/… DRIVE 2- drive.google.com/drive/folders/… DRIVE 3- drive.google.com/drive/folders/… DRIVE 4- drive.google.com/drive/folders/… May 9Ps be with you.

Don't you dare blink twice today, Hii Kenya yetu leo kuna vituko. Over there in Nairobi CBD, a young mikora who's a full-time intern at the GoFundMe Tom Mboya street branch was busy working from home on the pavement, pretending his legs were on strike. After hitting his day's target, the small scammer stood up casually to go deposit the day’s haram collections. When he returned to his workstation, the hard-eyed citizens had already rearranged his office layout. They caught him red-handed and began installing the WiFi of discipline on his legs. At first the young man tried to act disabled, dragging one leg like an extra from cobra squad. But after strokes increased from 2G to 5G speed, the boy resurrected instantly and shouted, “Eloi Eloi, I’m healed in Jesus name!” But the public was quick to remind him that Thou shall not call God’s name in vain especially during public participation hours! They then greeted him with a full community spanking package before releasing him to return the field report to his bosses at GoFundMe Headquarters huko Mukuru kwa Ruben. This reminded me of one incident where my highschool best friend Dennis Koros used to fake illness by just "falling down" alafu akiamka anapewa mkate na chai. One day he was taken to Sigilai facility unconscious. Kufika huko akapatana na wepesi who were used to such theatrics from the little man, they called the mortuary to come and pick their client. Gafla bin vuu the young man jumped from the examination couch and murifeed back to the school van. Chesaa!!

STATEMENT MADE.

Groundbreaking for Devki Mega Steel Project, Tororo, Uganda x.com/i/broadcasts/1…

Aptly put! I had to tag @DStv_Kenya @DStv on this one.

Happy birthday Monsieur Wenger!!

The Mamba is immortalized here in Kenya on a matatu (public transport bus) @kobebryant