Andy Graley

Dear Santa 1. McCarthy back 2. Naismith back 3. Stones back 4. Sign deulofeu 5. Play garbutt more 6. Give Baines his left leg back

@kfc new pulled chicken burger, got home to find hardly any chicken, really poor. #massiveletdown # nothinglikeadvert

@IcelandFoods about to have this Iceland pepperoni pizza for lunch, least cheese I have ever seen! #wheresthecheese

Pretty proud of myself with this one #COYB #EFC #MoyesOut #Mata #MataToUnited

@Alex_051 Scotch Ben & Jerrys, wow.

Ross Barkley superb on/off pitch 2day. Played superbly, said post match "never been interviewed, dead nervous but will give it a go" Top boy

@Alex_051 I make it work though. Like an accessory for my face!

#GiftForSanta some travel sickness pills. Just in case.

@johnlewisretail SO ANGRY! Ordered a tv at Liverpool One branch and have been sent one with an EU plug which won't work! #poorexperience

@Alex_051 absolute class! Cum like a madman. Hahaha

@chanksmith Real shit.

@hellopaulkelly @johnbond85 oh Christ, Gangnam style!

A cool way to break the ice at a party is to rush into a room and scream out "Holy shit have any of you guys seen 'I Robot'?!" and then cry.

@SoccerAM Met Everton player Seamus Coleman on my Stag do this summer with the lads, had an amazing time - Seamus is a top lad! #AskRocket

@johnbond85 @EASPORTSFIFA @hellopaulkelly @KRobbo88 lad ive seen it, it is the ONLY celebration now.

@seamiecoleman23 Lad did you love the riot the other day?

Thanks to all my real fans and people who believe in me. I am now a living legend that's for sure.

@johnbond85 @garyburke88 @hellopaulkelly i totally forgot. Shit that like.