Chris Archer

Things you have to do to balance up going to a James gig next July! Lewis f'ing Capaldi, Snow f'ing Patrol and Duran f'ing Duran. Give me strength

Just sprayed some insect spray on my legs as I am a magnet to mosquitos. The f'ing stuff has just melted my best pair of Adidas Sambas. Jeez. What does it do to the skin. No mozzie bites but 3rd degree burns

It's one thing for some poor excuse of a human being deciding to have a sh@t in a public place only for my dog to thoroughly roll in it. But if I was you mate I'd seek urgent medical advice. There's something wrong with your bowel movements

@Sean_Hornby74 @RealTimBooth Adele asked if you were going.

@RealTimBooth seems we've bought a decent player 🤞👍😁

Pissed myself yesterday. In a pub and there was a poor sod of an alcoholic/druggie in. Obviously well known he was harmless and you felt sorry for him. As he staggers out someone shouts 'take care Dave, drive safely'.

@RobertEndeacott Jeez Bob. You've finally got a prediction right😁😁🤐🤐

Going to be a rough & tumble game today, Burnley like to dish it out and get on the ref's case at the same time. Heart says a win but I've a feeling we're in for a score-draw, folks. #MOT.

@Norgeous Liam Gallagher singing a medley of Dancing Queen, Does Your Mother Know and Mamma Mia would be very interesting

@archercj We currently have an eclectic mix of Stormzy, Oasis & Abba 🤣

Just having a bit of a bedtime boogie with Little F. Can highly recommend a bit of twirling & slightly off key singing at the top of your voice and🕺🏼 💃🏼🕺🏼💃🏼 to fill the spirit & make you feel happy #familylife

@Andywebster I went to my first live gig in a pub since the start of the pandemic on Saturday. Thought it was going to be a sit down at table affair. NO. It got rammed. Luckily it was full of smelly rockers and that petunia oil kills all know germs.

The pandemic must be over in Leeds. Mask adherence inside is around 5-10% now

@RealTimBooth I came across this whist searching for some of your tour dates. Bloody hell was that your lockdown haircuts 😁😁😁😅😅😅🤣🤣🤣

Supposed to be in Cuba now but put the sensible head on and cancelled it. So it a trip to Costco instead for some toilet rolls. Apparently Costco's own brand are very soft and strong you know 😁😁😁🤐🤐🤐

In theold days you'd go to the hole in the wall, take out some cash and go on a session awaking the next day wondering how you could have spent so much. Now with electronic banking you look at your itemised statement and think fucking hell did I sup that much.

@Sean_Hornby74 @wearejames @RealTimBooth Agree Sean. Can see Beautiful Beaches being a crowd favourite at concerts as well.

Our new album 'All The Colours Of You' is OUT NOW! You can buy and listen to the full album here: James.lnk.to/AllTheColoursO…

@Gadgets360 @Andywebster We'll that gives some of the suppliers out there who are still using TLS 1.0 (no names of course) 13 months to come up with plenty of excuses 😁

Microsoft is officially retiring Internet Explorer in 2022, after more than 25 years gadgets.ndtv.com/apps/news/micr…

@RobertEndeacott It was you was it

@archercj Couldn't help myself, sorry mate, man's gotta do what he's gotta do poo.

It's bad enough when your dog rolls in fox shit but human excrement. Oh dear.

@Sean_Hornby74 Saw them in 1985 in Milton Keynes REM, Ramones, Billy Bragg, Spear of Destiny as support Great day

A 'local' author, I see 😂