elf™

How to be a beautiful moose: - be a moose - dont take anyones crap - if anyone gets near you, gore them repeatedly with your antlers - stomp on them too - make friends with flying squirrel

@TheTNHoller so, money for vaping and handjobs? sounds like a plan!

REP. BOEBERT ON THE $200 BILLION MORE TRUMP WANTS FOR HIS WAR: “I would not vote for a war supplemental. No. I am so tired of spending money elsewhere. I’m tired of the industrial war complex getting all our hard-earned tax dollars. We need America First policies.”

@EinienX @TheOnlyEsta what? no! no no! *Chump*

@TheOnlyEsta They misspelled Tramp?

Remember this⁉️🤣🤣🤣 Now she’s asking for money to get it removed….

@EinienX @ToriatheistTori so, is he getting a cabinet position or being made an honorary Duggar family member?

@ToriatheistTori Jebus fucking Crust! Homegrown terrorists.

@WilliamShatner oh jeez, she isnt a public figure so leave her alone? yikes...

What are you looking up my sister for‽ 😳😠

@karlykingsley Admin smarter than the current one:

Idiocracy was a documentary.

@BentleyAudrey Miller. He is a god damn monster.

Is there anyone more unlikable than Pete Hegseth?

@LaPistolaDulce i swear all the local donut shops are terrible here, they barely make enough to last the day - they sell out of anything really good or desirable by about 10 AM. THEY ARE DOING IT WRONG

I really wish I had a peach stuffed doughnut from donut man right now I need somebody in LA who loves me to bring me one. 😭😭

@HQNewsNow she lays on the compliments while withstanding the smells coming from Donnie. its quite the skill to have..

Japanese PM wishes Barron Trump a happy birthday: "Donald, tomorrow is the birthday of your son, Mr. Barron Trump, and I know he has grown up so much into a very tall, good looking gentleman. It is very clear where he got it. Of course, from his parents."

@Leah11118 @outbreakupdates try some shit called Science, it will be effective - Sky Wizard...not so much but nice try, good job~

@outbreakupdates I rebuke this in the Name of Jesus. I cast this fungus and any other virus back to the pit of hell where it came from. I protect all Gods children in the Blood of Jesus and decree wellness in our land again like as in Heaven and I thank you Heavenly Father for your protection!

I’m tired

@kyjablue @outbreakupdates so were not going to the buffet? *sulks* ok srsly, i still mask up because ppl are so fookin stupid...now it seems i need to be sanitizing my hands constantly too

@outbreakupdates And people ask me why I don’t go anywhere except to medical appointments or the grocery store. You couldn’t pay me to go to a public pool or movie theater now.

@tessaworld yus. but i are smol elf, so it helps.

@baconelf That’s some big ass blankets.

Up past my bedtime, tempted to go old school and pull a flashlight out and read in my blanket fort.

@DanKerrigan911 @BentleyAudrey we will need lasers or maybe a particle accelerator anyone have CERNs phone # handy?

@baconelf @BentleyAudrey

Who the fuck gets a panini at a gas station other than the elite Wawa?!

@DanKerrigan911 @BentleyAudrey jackhammer? something...

@baconelf @BentleyAudrey Chisels lol

@DanKerrigan911 @BentleyAudrey time to sharpen all the chisels too...

@baconelf @BentleyAudrey 😂

@DanKerrigan911 @BentleyAudrey go grab the power washer and a 5 gallon bucket of engine degreaser....its gon' be a long day ahead..

@baconelf @BentleyAudrey Right. Attitude first.

@tbigbee @BentleyAudrey no, this is Post Trump America™, regulations dont apply anymore

@BentleyAudrey This looks like all kinds of health violation

@DanKerrigan911 @BentleyAudrey seems easy to clean, hand me the grinder and the wire wheel....

@BentleyAudrey I don’t get people these days putting themselves out there like that. I just don’t get people I guess. Dogs FTW

@BentleyAudrey what the hell do they use for lube in that thing, used motor oil? yikes. more like a paNONO press

@transplnt_mdphd this means tacos....no, it does. IT. DOES.

It is 60 degrees at 5am. 🫠