Becci

😳 “MEN ONLY WANT ONE THING…” 🤣YOU ARE NOT READY FOR GRANDPA’S ANSWER!!!

I went down a rabbit hole on a Scott Mills FB fan page and found the scariest super fan ever. Please remember this tweet if we never see him again.

Anyone want anything from the fridge?

I fell in love with this quote: "No matter your age, you'll always wish you started younger, but today is the youngest you'll ever be. So start today."

Ok. So you hear this woman is going to do a pole dancing routine and you’re instantly turned off. But then… wait for it. I promise. Trust me. This is worth watching. You have learned to trust me by now. Right?

Just me? 📚

Used the transgender bathroom yesterday. Had to take a she/it.

Just heard Martin Clunes is already contracted to play Scott Mills 🙄🤷‍♂️😂

The harsh reality.

This is the most satisfying news you’ll hear today ! Do you remember when a group of boys, strangers to each other, formed a human chain to save a dog from fast flowing water? Today, local authorities unveiled a “Unity Statue” at the same place to celebrate human unity.

Many such cases

this is why you shouldn’t have a kid with just anyone. Dads are important.

Monday

HMRC waiting at Heathrow for those first Dubai flights to land

love how he’s fully committed to the bit

today’s generation doesn’t remember that IG had a whole activity tab and you’d be able to catch your ex liking Jessica’s photo 30 seconds ago🤣

No debt Ideal weight 8 hours of sleep Mental health on track Right nutrition Zero Alcohol This was my peak. I was 8. Good times…

Love this 😂

Stolen from another page. AWKWARD BRITISH PROBLEMS: 🇬🇧Staring at your phone in silent horror until the unknown number stops ringing 🇬🇧Hearing a recording of your own voice and deciding it’s perhaps best never to speak again 🇬🇧The relief when someone doesn’t answer their phone within three rings and you can hang up 🇬🇧Filming an entire fireworks display on your phone, knowing full well you’ll never, ever watch it again 🇬🇧 Mishearing somebody’s name on the second time of asking, meaning you must now avoid them forever 🇬🇧 Leaving it too late to correct someone, meaning you must live with your new name forever 🇬🇧 Running out of ways to say thanks when a succession of doors are held for you, having already deployed ‘cheers’, ‘ta’ and ‘nice one’ 🇬🇧 Changing from ‘kind regards’ to just ‘regards’, to indicate that you’re rapidly reaching the end of your tether 🇬🇧 Realising you’ve got about fifty grand’s worth of plastic bags under your kitchen sink 🇬🇧"You’ll have to excuse the mess” – Translation: I’ve spent seven hours tidying in preparation for your visit 🇬🇧 Indicating that you want the last roast potato by trying to force everyone else to take it 🇬🇧 "I’m off to bed” – Translation: “I’m off to stare at my phone in another part of the house” 🇬🇧 The overwhelming sorrow of finding a cup of tea you forgot about 🇬🇧 Turning down a cup of tea for no reason and instantly knowing you’ve made a terrible, terrible mistake 🇬🇧 Suddenly remembering your tea and necking it like a massive, lukewarm shot 🇬🇧 Waiting for permission to leave after paying for something with the exact change 🇬🇧 Saying hello to a friend in the supermarket, then creeping around like a burglar to avoid seeing them again 🇬🇧 Watching with quiet sorrow as you receive a different haircut to the one you requested 🇬🇧 Being unable to pay for something with the exact change without saying “I think that’s right” 🇬🇧 Overtaking someone on foot and having to keep up the uncomfortably fast pace until safely over the horizon 🇬🇧 Being unable to turn and walk in the opposite direction without first taking out your phone and frowning at it 🇬🇧 Deeming it necessary to do a little jog over zebra crossings, while throwing in an apologetic mini wave 🇬🇧 Punishing people who don’t say thank you by saying “you’re welcome” as quietly as possible 🇬🇧 Loudly tapping your fingers at the cashpoint, to assure the queue that you’ve asked for money and the wait is out of your hands 🇬🇧 Looking away so violently as someone nearby enters their PIN that you accidentally dislocate your neck 🇬🇧 Being sure to start touching your bag 15 minutes before your station, so the person in the aisle seat is fully prepared for your exit 🇬🇧 Repeatedly pressing the door button on the train before it’s illuminated, to assure your fellow commuters you have the situation in hand 🇬🇧 Having someone sit next to you on the train, meaning you’ll have to eat your crisps at home 🇬🇧 The huge sense of relief after your perfectly valid train ticket is accepted by the inspector 🇬🇧 The horror of someone you only half know saying: “Oh I’m getting that train too” 🇬🇧 “Sorry, is anyone sitting here?” – Translation: Unless this is a person who looks remarkably like a bag, I suggest you move it 🇬🇧 Worrying you’ve accidentally packed 3 kilos of cocaine and a dead goat as you stroll through “Nothing to declare” 🇬🇧 Being unable to stand and leave without first saying “right” 🇬🇧 Not hearing someone for the third time, so just laughing and hoping for the best 🇬🇧 Saying “anywhere here’s fine” when the taxi’s directly outside your front door. 🤣🤣