Paul

Blast from the past, only been a fan since 2008 though!

Pep Guardiola on visiting Wembley Stadium 24 times as #ManCity manager: “I’m so disappointed in English football that they haven’t made a ‘Pep stand’… at least a lounge or a box! Maybe if I go 24 more times…” 😂

This morning, a 65 year-old man woke up in the early hours and heard thieves in his garage. He called the police. Unfortunately, the officer on the phone told him they don't have any police officers free at the moment. The guy hung up and then called again in a moment and tells the officer: - it's about these thieves in my garage. Don't bother coming anymore i’ve shot them. After literally 2 minutes, 4 police cars, Armed response, counter terrorists, ambulances turned up,..... Thieves were obviously caught. Police officers had a chat with the gentleman Officer says - " You said you shot them! " Gentlemen - " And you said you don't have a free police car " Credit: Rudes On a roll

While #ManCity declined to comment on Darren Fletcher’s post-match complaints, their officials privately reacted with amusement because his sons, Jack and Tyler, were sent to @ManCity's academy in their formative years. [via @StevenRailston]

Nail, Head

@AFC_Gooner_Mark @SkySports Try supporting a local club like Portsmouth, instead of jumping on the glory train. Hope this helps

For anyone who is about to pick up my 2 tickets in The Clock End for the Burnley match. Make the most of them. My son's GCSE's have to come first. Thanks @SkySports you're a disgrace.

@UnitedDays99 When’s the parade?

We played you off the park 2 months ago and you all left on 70 mins..Hope this helps 🇾🇪

They’ve deleted the bridge tweet hahahahahahaha, the fucking bad mongs

@GortonsFinest @StretfordPaddck May as well be Celtic

@StretfordPaddck So what you mean is……….the better team won. 🥇

First and foremost, congratulations to the players for getting this far 👏 We were the better side in the first half but dropped off massively after the break. Regardless of the result, the lads should be proud of themselves ❤️ FT | 🔵2-1🔴 | #MUFC

@IE689908 Haaaaahaaa you’ve actually been on city website and found that? You weird cunt

Fully grown man btw from Halifax. I’m pretty sure Halifax have a football club. 🧐

@SkySportsNews Suck it up shitty pants

"I'm disappointed in the FA for everything that's gone around this game" 🗣️ Darren Fletcher reacts to Manchester United's 2-1 defeat to rival's Manchester City in the FA Youth Cup Final ⚽️

😂😂😂😂 fuck off, crying cunt.

Man United "fans" being all over my feed, constantly using Man City for clicks proves 2 things. 1. They have nothing about themselves to talk about 2. We have absolutely RUINED them. They are seriously damaged goods.

Sort of woman you wake up next to at a Butlins Weekender

@colinmufc2 The irony….. plastic *checks-ireland 😳🧐

Complete silence from city fans about the game not being played at the Etihad High profile ones who sat in a box for the derby saying “who cares about the academy” etc And now that they won they all come out of their caves And that’s why we call you plastic glory hunters

@MUFC_RA So very invested in this competition weren’t you. Not the early rounds obviously, you were all very very busy. But the final, now that’s a different story. Pathetic attempt to point score.

@AdamJoseph There’s something incredibly weird about someone supporting a club they never go and watch from Australia and bleat on about City every single day on a social media platform. Genuinely need their hard drives checked.

There is something incredibly weird about the people on here slating young kids in an FA Cup Youth Final. Missing the whole point of supporting the Academy players. Genuinely need their heads checked.

Wow that was a strange dream! I dreamt that the biggest club in the world have been crying all week coz they only got 986 tickets to a youth cup game only for the men in black turn up with flares flags & nursery rhymes & start on city’s under 13s get dicked & get off!

@PeteMolyneux2 Embraced youth football that much that the semi attracted 2.5k 🙄 talk some bollocks you lot.

Nothing to do with local rivalry or unaddressed financial charges, Manchester City have NEVER attracted or inspired a fanatical following. For decades #MUFC have embraced youth football back to the MUJACS in 1938 & European football since 1956. City fans treat both with contempt

Heartbreaking at the end seeing Utd players collect their runners up medals & not one red stayed to clap their heroic effort. Overheard one player say ‘it’s the biggest day of our lives & not only did we not get to play at the Etihad … we’ve been abandoned' Such a shame 👋

Loads of empty seats at the cinema earlier. Embarrassing isn't the word. I told them they were a shit small cinema that couldn't sell out their allocated seats. They just said "Fuck off you sad cunt" 🤷‍♂️🤔😃