Abner Brown

I will stop their Christmas service if it's the last thing I do.

@PeterPurplePim @CarolineLouisa6 @chubbyjoe1 @PouncerSD @foxyfacedcharl1 @tatchester @bobthebakers He knows it's absolutely forbidden to restrict the right to trial by a jury of scrobblers. I don't like the look of them at all.

Well, what else would you expect from one of the Joneses?! You do see who it is, don't you?! 😄 @brown_abner @CarolineLouisa6 @chubbyjoe1 @PouncerSD @foxyfacedcharl1 @tatchester @bobthebakers

Just dropping back in to share this simply splendiferous new Box of Delights podcast. youtu.be/UOO6GZ5NJlM

@PouncerSD Wishing you both well and your mum a swift and full recovery. X

…excruciating pain and and been sent a self referral for physio and more powerful painkillers. So thankful it wasn’t a fracture as mum has osteopenia, but got home and sobbed as I made dinner as I just feel overwhelmed right now and wish we had a bigger circle around us. 🥹

Emeralds, been in A&E today with mum. They thought she had a fracture in her neck. Sitting watching the carnage that is the NHS was sobering and terrifying. Packed. People laying on chairs in pain. Horrendous. Thankfully after a CT scan it showed no fracture. But she’s in…

@PouncerSD I'm sure I'll be back, like the bad penny that always Abner is. x

@brown_abner Miss seeing you here x

I'm not going to give support to a platform that enables and encourages abuse. Abner will continue posting over at Bluesky bsky.app/profile/brown-… but unless and until X gets its house in order, this account will be on pause. Hope to see you later.

Either Chesters Missionary College exists in a bubble of reality that is immune to extreme weather, or the Condicote Bugle has been ever so slightly exaggerating the weather forecast.

@Condicote7000 @SargeCraig667 😂🤣

@brown_abner @SargeCraig667 If you get stuck just cup your hands as well and the hassistant is bound to know what you're after

Feeling bereft: I've just suffered an unexplained but overwhelming urge to pop into Woolworths and buy a quarter of pick-n-mix (heavy on Murray Mints and Lion Toffee), a can of white emulsion and 6 yards of bell wire.

The weather is extreme and unpredictable. Despots with giant egos stalk the land. Nobody and nothing is safe, even Christmas. Meanwhile, at Chesters we are doing jigsaws and toasting choirboys, and wondering what's gone wrong with the world?

@Condicote7000 @SargeCraig667 Well I know it is gigantulous. Beyond that I'm going to have to busk it, but how many gigantulous items can there be in the Woolies kitchenware section?

@brown_abner @SargeCraig667 As long as you know what a jorum is. That young Master Harker never waits to find out!

@Condicote7000 @SargeCraig667 Splendid notion - I expect I can get a jorum at Woolies.

@SargeCraig667 @brown_abner Might I suggest a posset as the panacea to your ills?

@SargeCraig667 Fortunately Mr Hawlings' box enables one to enter the past and, specifically, FW Woolworths, 23 The High Street, Tatchester, circa 1976.

@brown_abner About Woolworths Guv.....you may have a long trip to the 'nearest branch'

@SargeCraig667 Despite existing on a plane outside time, space and morality, Animus insists on synchronizing his watch with the speaking clock.

@brown_abner It's Christmas Eve in the Julian calendar. Animos never did upgrade his timepiece back in 1752.

The good news is that Animus has whipped-up a first rate blizzard and the clergy definitely won't be reaching the cathedral. The bad news is that, due to Condicote Parish Council no longer clearing the pavements, we are stuck in this dratted bunker until Christmas.

@foxyfacedcharl1 Saints alive! I'll bring my copy of the Boys Bumper Book of Splendiferous Yarns - and an equally bumper bag of Alka Seltzer.

Well me and the boys were going to have a few lemonades tonight, we had hoped you could Join us and regail us with one of your tails boss haha what

Twelfth night is associated with feasting, drinking and the reversal is social hierarchies. So, for one night only I shall be allowing @foxyfacedcharl1 to call me a dolt - if he's not too sloshed.

Due to an outbreak of curates playing find the lady on the commuter service, I have annexed Musborough Junction, scrobbled that old fool with a handbell and am going to make the 1640 to Condicote run on time.

@chauffeurjim @Roberta1776 @SketchesbyBoze @bobthebakers Which, from the snug of the Drop of Dew, is no mean feat.

@Roberta1776 @SketchesbyBoze @brown_abner @bobthebakers Thank you Ma’am for your approval but to be honest, Abner does the talking. I keep my eye on the road. 🚙

Make it your goal this year to read two of the most delightful books ever written, The Midnight Folk and The Box of Delights. There’s no work of fiction I’ve read in the past two years I enjoyed more. C. S. Lewis was a fan, and the books were a huge influence on Narnia.

@MarksTweetPlace @PouncerSD @foxyfacedcharl1 @TheKnowe @Condicote7000 @tatchester @BoxOfDelights84 @chauffeurjim @BoyWaterfall @TatchesterC And the best of scrobbling to all for the new year!

@abnerpuddis @SketchesbyBoze Why, thank you!

@SketchesbyBoze Abner Brown. A great villain.