:)

Teamsheets from Stamford Bridge. Forest put out severely weakened side. Game over before it’s begun?

@markmcadamtv @caulfield7 congratulations to Bournemouth. Great to see you being rewarded for a brilliant season of football playing the beautiful game . At our expense today but appreciate the quality and attractiveness of your play 👏👏👏❤️💙. PS … that penalty decision was a shocker.

Even as a Bournemouth fan I think that’s a 100% NOT A PENALTY. Honest opinion.

Bournemouth have just got a penalty for this… I’m not quite sure how. 😅 x.com/bfernandesball…

@BobbyManzi “Clashes” ?

@BillyCove10 Thought this was about my fav porn niche

Unreal facials 😮‍💨😩🤣😅⚽️⚽️

@nadine79700 @DadAllOver77 @TravelodgeUK @IslingtonBC Just complain at reception. Attention seeking freak

Shocking hygiene @TravelodgeUK London King’s Cross Royal Scot. Tattered carpets, thick dust & a mouse running the halls. Reported to @IslingtonBC Environmental Health. Unacceptable for a family stay. Misleading photos vs. grim reality. Avoid! #Travelodge #LondonHotels #Warning

@TheGriftReport What in the Universal Credit is this?

Dine-dashers who ran up a £540 bill at a steakhouse and then legged it without paying are being hunted by police. A group of people enjoyed a slap-up meal at Miller & Carter in Kettering on April 6 between 5pm and 7.10pm before calmly walking out leaving the £539.70 tab unpaid. Northamptonshire Police have now released CCTV images of the suspects and are appealing for anyone who recognises them to come forward. It’s the second time in weeks the same branch has been hit by dine-and-dashers. Anyone with information should call police on 101 quoting incident number 26000213409.

@HLTCO @EnolaJon

@EnolaJon I’m well aware Jon, it says MUFC in your profile. Get back to texting Babeststion and cry wanking

How have you put Mostar so far down your list? Euro aways are wasted on these scruffs.

This could be an interesting summer 👀⚽️

@VyrusDaCyrus Anal sex is like a Man United football shirt. You don’t want it, but your uncle gives it to you anyway

How does anal sex feel compared to vaginal sex?

It’s only Crystal Palace’s second season playing European football and they might win a trophy before Arsenal 😂

@BazzaJones1968 @HolywellTownFC @FCQPwxm Coward.

There should be the same consequences facing this man for this incident in the @HolywellTownFC Vs @FCQPwxm match Utterly disgraceful from Nicky Williams 🤬 He shouldn't step foot on another football pitch in Wales 👊

@KingvagabondHOL @Dominos_UK I’d love to see Spuds in championship for a season. Would be sooooo funny

@Dominos_UK @caulfield7 I'd take Spurs getting relegated. Don't get me wrong, Arsenal have an entitled and hypocritical fan base and they certainly wouldn't be a glorious champion with their style of play but look at the other choice. Do we really want a team with 115 charges against it winning instead?

you can only pick one: -Spurs get relegated -Arsenal bottle everything

@TonyIncenzo 1. Crystal Palace 2. Crystal Palace 3. Brighton 4. Crystal Palace 5. Crystal Palace

QUICK SURVEY! 1. Which is the nearest football team to where you were born? 2. Which is the nearest team to where you grew up? 3. Which is the nearest team to where you live now? 4. Which team do you have historical family ties with? 5. Which team do you support?

For Conor’s sake, I hope that news is fake

“Prime Carrington” and it’s a kid you stole from Palace’s academy

@CyberSaffron Booom

@caulfield7 Yes!

Eastbourne - but whereabouts? If you think you know, have a guess 🔽