Dylan

as a child I stepped on a rake because I thought it wouldn't work

if you are polish 23 and Me sends your results as a picture book

Larry David would not experience so much toil if he could refrain from sin

@bramiscute how much? As I said, I don't have high cash flow. I would very much like to get involved in a psychosexual step-mother-step-son style relationship with a middle aged chinese woman. I would love to see her. Perhaps a drawing? Warmly, Dylan

@ccp_activist I'll ask my auntie to adopt you. Don't worry, she's very sexy

Put my girlfriend's savings account on a Kalshi Market Prediction on Joshman winning. Can anyone pay for my BoBC reg?

@bramiscute Fuck that shit. I started looksmaxxing but I could only afford the meth. I banked the rest on the envelope. Turns out im american white shit. fuck american.

@ccp_activist I already got my red envelope. It was a Starbucks gift card and Fire Horse meat

@GriffyAshMan @pktjester for real though I got raped by a mailman

@GriffyAshMan @pktjester full o' dracalas

Be careful how scared you look at the post office

going back in time 150 years to give all the general e lee statues big perky nattys to stop the election of Donald trump

it is important to remember that if you kill every cop no one can arrest you

@bramiscute you get more ply if you shove the whole roll up your ass #moneylifestyleandmentalitiesenablingcomfortandluxury

Mfs be talking about 1 ply or 3 ply... Bitch we got Bounty 🏜

due to Donald trumps attitude I will not be celebrating presidents day this year

@bramiscute alcoholics in dry January, "I love black history month. I cannot wait for black history month to hang out with all of my black friends."

People participating in dry January be like, "What are you doing in February? Wanna grab a beer then?"

nominative determinist be like "how else do you explain Dr evil. why did he kill so many people."

racist guy who shoots up brown university

y'all get a garage if you can. somebody fucked the shit out of my car. loud as fuck too. fuckin teenagers and their hormones

@ofctimallen I wish I could nonsexually impregnate yo butt. unfortunately I have to use my penis in your huge ass. you will probably be the only one happy about this bullshit.

@ofctimallen come over. wear your dress. the one I like. it makes your tits pop. you sexy dog

@ofctimallen to me you are sexy like a girl

@ofctimallen let me fuck it. your big mushy butt