gosh

P.T. Barnum once said that there's a sucker born every minute; an unholy union of something both Oedipal and Sisyphean, forced to relive the moment of his birth again and again for all eternity...And now, for only ten cents, you too can see the amazing

@ThisStupidTwink this is a really excellent comic

@afraidofwasps im really proud of you 👍

Let's gooooooooo

im sapping your energy canning it and storing it on refrigerated shelves! :) im going to sell it to customers

*sadly* ever since the gold claims went dry, this town has gotten big enough for the two of us

*misheard james bond's name earlier* no, i expect you to die.. mr bob

Heartwarming! They put seatbelts on the turnip truck so no more naive country rubes will fall off

Cruella de vil pulling up to the banquet in a dog skin scarf and the whole party is scared

@lunch_enjoyer this is the exact plot of how i met your mother

“Dad what were you like in the 90s” viral trend

scientists have genetically engineered a mouse with a jellyfish gene allowing it to glow green, which will, i assume, ultimately help the economy or something

mean girl trying to bully someone but shes just started adderall and the dose is too much: i just think its so brave how you dont care about how even your eyelash amount is on each side

@DrCameronFetter @oldfriend99 ive been calling these things pumpkins for three quests now and not one person in my party has bothered to correct me a single time #smh

Wait i genuinely thought these magical drinks were called Portions because they come in amounts 😭

@normal_ballerz really don't want to do this

tossing a blanket over your head to make you go to sleep like a bird

surgeon entering the waiting room and approaching patient's family members, looking dishevelled and sad, voice extremely quiet and strained: "pretty much all of his blood came out"

Raising my hand at every enclosure at the zoo and asking: so they're not so different from us after all?

golf commentator: wow he hit the ball really far there. but now it landed in the sand so thats pathetic