Dan Grandfield

@pharma_mule @MikeStewart79 Tough job being the manager of a McDonald’s

Suppose that once a week, ten men go out for beer and the bill for all ten comes to £100. If they paid their bill the way we pay our taxes, it would go something like this... The first four men (the poorest) would pay nothing. The fifth would pay £1. The sixth would pay £3. The seventh would pay £7. The eighth would pay £12. The ninth would pay £18. And the tenth man (the richest) would pay £59.　 So, that's what they decided to do. The ten men drank in the bar every week and seemed quite happy with the arrangement until, one day, the owner caused them a little problem. "Since you are all such good customers," he said, "I'm going to reduce the cost of your weekly beer by £20." Drinks for the ten men would now cost just£80. The group still wanted to pay their bill the way we pay our taxes. So the first four men were unaffected. They would still drink for free but what about the other six men? The paying customers? How could they divide the £20 windfall so that everyone would get his fair share? They realized that £20 divided by six is £3.33 but if they subtracted that from everybody's share then not only would the first four men still be drinking for free but the fifth and sixth man would each end up being paid to drink his beer.　 So, the bar owner suggested that it would be fairer to reduce each man's bill by a higher percentage. They decided to follow the principle of the tax system they had been using and he proceeded to work out the amounts he suggested that each should now pay. And so, the fifth man, like the first four, now paid nothing (a100% saving). The sixth man now paid £2 instead of £3 (a 33% saving). The seventh man now paid £5 instead of £7 (a 28% saving). The eighth man now paid £9 instead of £12 (a 25% saving). The ninth man now paid £14 instead of £18 (a 22% saving). And the tenth man now paid £49 instead of £59 (a 16% saving).　 Each of the last six was better off than before with the first four continuing to drink for free.　 But, once outside the bar, the men began to compare their savings. "I only got £1 out of the £20 saving," declared the sixth man. He pointed to the tenth man, "but he got £10!"　 "Yeah, that's right," exclaimed the fifth man. "I only saved a £1 too. It's unfair that he got ten times more benefit than me!"　 "That's true!" shouted the seventh man. "Why should he get £10 back, when I only got £2? The wealthy get all the breaks!"　 "Wait a minute," yelled the first four men in unison, "we didn't get anything at all. This new tax system exploits the poor!" The nine men surrounded the tenth and beat him up.　 The next week the tenth man didn't show up for drinks, so the nine sat down and had their beers without him. But when it came time to pay the bill, they discovered something important - they didn't have enough money between all of them to pay for even half of the bill!　 And that, boys and girls, journalists and government ministers, is how our tax system works. The people who already pay the highest taxes will naturally get the most benefit from a tax reduction. Tax them too much, attack them for being wealthy and they just might not show up any more. In fact, they might start drinking overseas, where the atmosphere is somewhat friendlier.　 For those who understand, no explanation is needed. For those who do not understand, no explanation is possible.

@VodafoneUK truly appalling customer service. My wife has now had a phone that does not function overseas for over one year. Customer service information conflicts consistently with itself depending on who you speak to. We are business mobile and broadband customers not For long!

@chinnyreckon21 @smallgingergirl Loved Seville

Once I get my passport sorted out I fancy taking the kids on a city break, I was thinking Barcelona but is there anywhere else that is worth going to. I want to go somewhere that is completely different to the UK to give them a really good experience.

Research by Reuters Institute found 46% of people in UK are avoiding mainstream media and 55% of them say it is because the news brings them down. That is EXACTLY why @dangrand1 and I created our Time for the Good News podcast tune in now and feel happy! - timeforthegoodnews.co.uk

@easyJet still haven’t received compensation for my cancelled flight even though a telephone customer service agent told me I would and she also told me this is why my expense claim was turned down.So annoying

@easyJet thank you so much for not reimbursing my alternative travel expenses. As there was a flight within 24 hours. I had to be at work and I ticked the for “business”box. Poor airline for business if you think this is acceptable

@CrossCountryUK wow first class ticket after cancelled flight. Up since 0430 and now cross country trains no catering until Newcastle.

@easyJet @easyJet_press where’s the bags need to get on with alternative travel arrangements , Edinburgh airport

@easyJet thanks for the nightmare of getting up at 0400 cost of hotel, flight and now train tickets. Massive queues at Edinburgh airport and you cancel the flight an hour before. And still@waiting for@my bags to be offloaded so better not miss my expensive train!

@David_RB82 Not just food price inflation and vat returning to normal but a 9% increase in national living wage. Prices have to rise.

My pleasure sir it was one of my favourite views from our trip to Bhutan in 2019

Brilliant stuff from Burmieston, if you get a chance go and stay there. Peace and tranquility personified!

@FlyLoganair I just have thanks

@dangrand1 hello, can you please DM us your booking references and we can email you over receipts? ^pw

@FlyLoganair can I please just have some receipts for £300 domestic flights. No response to message submissions and continuing failure to answer the phone. I know your operating because I’ve flown on your planes!

Top of the pops

Could 2 followers please copy and re-post this tweet? We’re trying to demonstrate that someone is always listening. Call 116 123 (Samaritans United Kingdom and Ireland) Just two. Any two. Copy, not retweet.

Nothing remotely cynical about releasing a raft of education data showing a steep drop in pupil attainment on the same day as Sturgeon’s Covid update.