Dan

@lindiortega And who likes being told they can't have something?...makes me want it more

But speaking of the garden of eden… like can we really blame eve if some persuasive nope rope is instigating apples? Cause apples are tasty actually and if I was naked and hungry and snakey mcsnakeface is all hissy with the apple I’d just be like ok bro… calm down go away.

Today's round of "guess where I am" might not be as easy

So long Bangkok...I feel like we just started getting to know each other

Let's play "guess where I am"

Just one of the enjoyable moments of my day...

@ThatEricAlper Stranger things have happened - Foo Fighters

@lukesawhook Yep...had it with Godwin too before it got called back

Who just won their Fantasy Football game with this touchdown?!? 😱

@OpenandMarried You're incredible and he will see that...you got this!

@ThatEricAlper The call for the void by Stellafox

@BarryOnHere Change the song to something that wasn't terrible

Wyd if you walk in on your wife getting railed by your neighbor while "FireFlies" from Owl City is playing in the background?

@KyleForgeard @elonmusk So the king of Mars will get to decide who fucks who? Is this what you people want?? Seems like a slippery slope Kyle...

He said i could smash the first girl on mars @elonmusk

@LibertyLayne01 youtu.be/em05Zx9W35c

You just scaled a fence and stole a car. The police are on your tail. What song are you blasting?

@Sarsinator Better get on that margarita then!

New bikinis arrived and with all this snow I'm a margarita and a couple clicks away from booking Mexico ⛱️👙 #VacationLongOverdue 🌞

@McClure89375973 Thank you I'm happy you enjoyed it!

My short cover of Rocket Man #cover #pianocover #rocketman

@Sarsinator Your optimism is much appreciated!

Well the Oilers didn't win but I got dressed up today so I consider that a victory 🙌 #ISwearNotAllMyClothesAreBlack 👯‍♀️

@me_teaor Thank you 😊

My acoustic guitar cover of Valerie #cover #acousticguitar #coversong

@BagdMilkSoWhat @Natalie_Wanner1 @nixw20 😂😂

@JohnRMoffitt Haha so true..hopefully the coronavirus does save us from trump the only way it knows how...

Lying to the nation that we are number one in healthcare while it seems obvious we're last ... the United States (Trump) becomes the NUMBER ONE laughing stock on the planet. #GrifterInChief #CoronaVirus #Pandumbic

Trump shows off just how clueless he is about nearly everything. His pathologically lying narcissism was all over it ... bragging about a #1 healthcare system when we are LAST in testing. #CoronaVirus #Pandumbic nymag.com/intelligencer/…