Gab

Happy birthday, weed

Today’s to do list: 1. Bite off more than I can chew 2. Build Rome in one day 3. Poke a bear with a stick 4. Beat a dead horse 5. Skate on thin ice

watching reality tv is deeper and more anthropological when i do it

Boss: “It’ll be easier to discuss on a quick call, are you free now?” Me:

Me changing a .doc to PDF for someone making twice my salary.

The little 30 year old that could

too busy smoking my own grass to notice if yours is greener

We’ve got you for 4/20🌿 42,000 free credits for every customer and every new April signup! (Minimum subscription package required)

White collar jobs in 2016: Free cold brew on tap! Conference rooms? Too old school! We’re yoga ball people. We have catered lunch on Wednesdays. If your benefits don’t cover something you need, tell us! White collar jobs in 2026: Use Chat GPT or we’ll hit you

everybody who’s starting summer house this week due to the drama is going to shit their pants when they see erika kirk

Can confirm

How does my company expect me to work when there is breaking news in the Bravoverse

Me post-buccees BEC biscuit this AM

The size of the universe can not diminish the importance of fighting against cruelty and immiseration.

Of course

We spent the last 9 months raiding Home Depot parking lots instead of arresting anyone from the massive network of Iranian terrorist cells?

I have been on twitter for the majority of my life now- i fear that explains too much #MyTwitterAnniversary

god forbid i smoke weed in public while the elites eat children

I earned this substance abuse