Rick

Christoph Niemann: "The only relevant artistic talent is the ability to deal with frustration."

@selentelechia whole thread real af

this whole thread describes a very real problem that does require some thought and care and that there's a real risk of not solving but it is also like bait for the demons of despair

I am starting to worry that having actual real genuine fun without that little stressed out itch of responsibility at the back of my awareness is incompatible with having a life that isn't a trainwreck and idk what to do about that

@visakanv Related: I'm often ~blind to the actual underlying source, people close to me can sometimes clock hangups faster/easier. Tolerating frustration with grace makes it easier for people to just give you the answer sometimes.

you need counteraction and you also need to identify what the original frustration-aversion was protecting you from and address this. which is can be a complicated and frustrating process, lol. so it's another version of "hard to focus on learning to focus when you can't focus"

it took me a really long time to see frustration tolerance as skill, rather than an innate quality. I think because there were some things I was very determined not to tolerate growing up. So it gets a little complicated. but muddying the details here can get very costly

@tjrwriting @selentelechia Seems kinda like • Body/mind stores v miscalibrated threat level for thing • Think about situation involving thing • Body does predictive simulation, anticipates way overblown threat * Autonomic aversion response The autonomic bit is what makes it hard to notice happening.

@tjrwriting @selentelechia Anyway there's like... a thread that feels intuitively true, between avoidance in the romantic attachment sense, my moderate ARFID, and ADHD symptoms that kinda overlap with Pathological Demand Avoidance (IDK if this science is good). en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pathologi…

fyi if a noticeable % of your difficulties with focus and executive function have roots in an unresolved internal conflict, unacknowledged motivations, etc...Adderall just gives the same resources to all sides 😛 I suspect this is part of what's up with long-term tolerance tbh

The Campus is underrated as a unit of social organization.

Similarly with psychedelics for suicidal patients. If you're at the point that the government assents to you killing yourself, maybe the government should encourage you to take your chances with the 6D Mesoamerican demon first.

sometimes my daydreaming about "transformative automated PKM systems that finally let you really do the thing" is just positivity-washing the act of compulsively fantasizing about being someone else (who is worthy of love) and then taking actions that don't help with that wound

don't check in on your most autistic friend right now. they are deep in a claude rabbit hole making bespoke spreadsheets and they have never been better

@nosilverv Ah, the bliss of not realizing it, lol. Realizing, adjusting, and having it happen again anyway, with multiple major life pillars has been frustrating. There's maybe some buddhist-adjacent stuff in here re: expectations, future, suffering

You can spend your whole life in this loop and never realize it…

I just think it's a beautiful lens to see the world through, I guess. And one that's easily forgotten.

There should be no expectation that nourishing technology will automatically be built for your ~family. If you want it to exist, y'all may have to build it yourself. This requires cultivating the habit of imagining it for yourself.

Crafting small and imperfect software can be an act of intimacy.