ofc.its__Charles

@kaninikega1 Pole sana

Officially an ORPHAN.

Kenya gov't will collapse in 10-15 yrs from now with public debt of kshs 2.6 trillion currently if oil and minerals aren't mined in 7 yrs.

While in Israel @UKenyatta learnt that he had been lied to by Ruto about the Israel's 100% financing of Galana Irrigation scheme.

When I say that I know Ruto in and out, I know him. Ruto has never worked hard for anything that he owns. He only knows deals. That is all!

If you want to know where corruption exists in gov't, just check what William Ruto defends. Remember when he said 'laymen' on Eurobond!!

I wish i was on Twitter during my undergraduate years. The information here quietly reshapes your mindset, pushes you to do better, and encourages you to get the best out of school.

@KagutaMuseveni 😂😂😂😂

I decided to come here to the centre where peasants live to demonstrate that it is possible.

In your 20s, you will find out about the Erasmus Mundus Scholarship or fully funded scholarships in general. It is very important that you submit your application

KCB has reduced Pesalink transfer charges to Sh20 for transactions between Sh1,000 and Sh999,999, while transfers below Sh1,000 are now free. The move is part of the banking sector’s “Tuma Direct na 20” campaign.

KRA has started counting tithe and offerings. When I was growing up, my parents took me to our local Catholic church. After the Sunday school, we all converged for the main service. Mitha. Misa. Mass. When the time for offerings reached. The whole church always broke into this particular song as everyone queued with money in hand heading to the offering box. 🎶 Nengera Ngai kiria kiri giake, aha… Nake Kaisari munei kiria giake, aha… Namumunyage ciothe ciumite kwi Ngai, aha... 🎶 It is the men with deep bass voices who used to artistically inject the “Aha.” Then Wagura, the drum boy, sneaks in the beats and suddenly the whole church transforms into a live concert. To date, that remains one of the most melodious songs I have ever heard. Beautiful harmony. Now, all along, I was fully convinced Kaisari was Satan. Infact, when a stubborn boy misbehaved, we all told him: Ugathie gwa Kaisari. Meaning, you shall go to Caesar. Which in our theology then, meant Satan hellfire. And the boy would apologize instantly I know you. Karibu unitwange makofi for refusing to translate the song. So here you go. 🎶 Give to Caesar what belongs to Caesar. And to God what belongs to God. But know everything comes from God. 🎶 It is later in class 8 that I discovered Caesar was not Satan. Caesar was the Roman king and tax collector. • Lesson 1: Take your son and daughter to the Sunday school. Now, There is a church called Thika Baptist Church. They preach and advance the gospel of Jesus Christ. KRA caught wind that the church was collecting serious tithe and offerings. They ordered for their bank statements. After analysis, what came out was a tax bill of 5 million shillings. The next morning, the pastor woke up at 3am for morning glory prayers. He reached for his phone. An email notification popped up. Bahati mbaya. It was KRA. Delivering the bill. Breakthrough ended instant. At dawn, he rushed to KRA and explained: - The church only survives on tithes and offerings. - Tithes and offerings are specifically exempted from tax by law. KRA could not hear any of it. KRA insisted: - Tithes and offerings are not automatically exempted - A church must first obtain a tax exemption certificate from KRA - Only then can the offerings escape tax. The church disagreed. It argued: - The law itself already exempts tithes and offerings - A tax exemption certificate is useless where income is already exempted by law The church said: - Certificates are only useful where income is taxable, but you seek special tax exemption. KRA got tired of stories. They insisted they only wanted 5M. The church ran to court. The Tribunal looked at the case carefully. Then agreed with the church. It ruled: - Tithes and offerings are tax exempted by law - Therefore, a tax exemption certificate is unnecessary The church was ordered to pay nothing. KRA retreated to Times Tower swearing Kaisari cannot go home empty handed. They appealed to the High Court. KRA argued: - For church offerings to escape tax, there must be a valid exemption certificate from KRA Judge Majanja, having gone to the Alliance, could not believe what he was hearing. He removed his spectacles. Paused. Then asked KRA: Guys, are you serious you want to tax tithe and offerings? KRA nodded like this. The whole court went silent. Judge Manjaja then turned to the church. He ruled: - Tithes and offerings are exempted from tax. - Exemption certificates are unnecessary for income already exempted by law. - The church was ordered to pay KRA nothing. - KRA was ordered to pay legal fees to the church. Case closed. Lesson 2. • Give to Caesar what belongs to Caesar does not apply to tithe and offerings. • A church whose only income is tithe and offerings does not require a tax exemption certificate. • KRA will push. Push hard. Special thanks to Thika Baptist Church for sealing this jurisprudence.

Every time I see videos like these I remember an Advocate called @akusalaw. He sued the police and a specific officer who assaulted him. He won and ended up attaching the police officers payslip. That story was funny coz the guy couldn't believe it. Akusala stood ten toes down!

@akusalaw @SteeNyamu If such a thing happens I think I will look for you 🤌🏾

@SteeNyamu Yeah: revenge must be personally and deliberate, served with patience.

Si mpigie tu mama zenu muwaambie mnawapenda. What's all this performative bullshit ya kumpost na captions like you two are some teenagers

My best side of X "I won a masters scholarship" " I am graduating" "I finally submitted my thesis " "I got the job" "I, My mom, my dad, my kid has/have beaten cancer" "Maraga the sixth"

I really hope my bro Tetu Shani is okay wherever he is. The industry isn't the same without him.

Kenya should take up Dangote’s offer ASAP. That will mean we can supply refined oil to all EAC and SADC bloc

Ukiona akicheka hivi huezi jua anaeza kuua na slippers.

@UndercoverKe @MoraraKebaso Pricing in business is affected by different things kama rent , labour etc.

@MoraraKebaso I came to your furniture shop for upholstery work. I was told a 7-seater would cost Ksh100, 000. Another workshop along Eastern bypass- just 10 minute drive- gave a quotation of Ksh70,000. Apply this to your question.

Some things will take me forever to understand. Why does a 1 and a half hour flight from Nairobi to Dar Es Salaam cost Ksh. 40,000 to Ksh 50,000 yet a 24 hour flight from Nairobi to China is Ksh 75,000. What exactly is going on? Why does accomodation for one night at a four star hotel in Kenya cost Ksh 20,000 yet in China a four star hotel is Ksh 5,000 per night? Why do borrowers in Kenya pay an interest rate of 18% to 22% for loans yet in China the interest rate is 3%. How will a kenyan company that is borrowing to expand its manufacturing technology or equipment compete with a chinese company that is borrowing 1 billion dollars at 3%?

@xysist @MwagiAdv Eeehhh mwalimu 😂😅

@MwagiAdv Good 😊

Tunafikirianga ni jokes kumbe niggas actually send ?