Dale Howe

Council tax up 5% again & they can't even spell my name correctly on the letter. Good to see my money is funded these thieves.

@BasilTheGreat So i can't take my daughter out for a few days for a holiday but this is ok? Hmmm

Schools in Britain are now closing for Eid-Mubarak An Islamic festival that has absolutely nothing to do with British Culture or Identity. We are being colonised

@DeadlineDayLive & there was me thinking tapping up is dead 😅.

🗣️🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 David Beckham: "We worked for four years to sign Messi. I managed to sneak into his father's hotel, we talked, and I proposed bringing Leo to Miami. He told me they would consider my offer. Apple, Adidas, and MLS itself were behind the signing. When we realised Messi wasn’t happy at PSG, we saw an opportunity and pushed for it to happen. He had offers from Saudi Arabia, but what worried me the most was that he would choose to return to Barcelona; in the end, he didn’t. His father notified us that he would announce his future in 2 days, so we were on alert. I was in Japan, it was 5:00 AM, my kids and wife were asleep, and suddenly, a flood of notifications on my phone from my partners telling me that Messi had announced he was coming to Miami. It was beautiful because it took us a lot of hard work. He’s an incredible player, very intelligent; he sees things that others don’t. He completely changed the club."

Dear Prime Minister & Home Secretary, I hope this letter finds you well, fully caffeinated, and in possession of a calculator. I’m writing with what I believe is a modest, fiscally responsible proposal. I understand the Government is offering up to £40,000 to certain individuals to voluntarily leave the United Kingdom. First of all — bold strategy. Nothing says “strong borders” quite like a cashback scheme. Now, I regret to inform you that I am, in fact, a fully tax-paying, law-abiding British citizen. I know — awkward. I appreciate this may disqualify me from the premium exit package, but I’m willing to negotiate. I would like to formally apply for £35,000 to leave. You see, unlike some applicants, I haven’t broken any laws to get here. I didn’t arrive by dinghy. I didn’t require processing, housing, or legal appeals. I’ve actually been funding the whole operation through PAYE for years — which I believe makes me a loyal shareholder in this enterprise. Given that you’re prepared to offer £40,000 for someone to depart voluntarily after entering illegally, I feel £35,000 for someone who’s been here legally all along represents excellent value for money. Think of it as a “Buy British, Get One Gone” discount. For £35,000 I will:    •   Leave quietly.    •   Not require a press conference.    •   Not demand a diversity officer to wave me off.    •   Even carry my own suitcase to the airport. I may also tweet a polite thank-you note on departure, praising the efficiency of the scheme. Frankly, it feels like I’ve misunderstood how incentives work in modern Britain. All these years I thought obeying the law, paying taxes, and contributing to society were the winning strategy. Turns out the real pro-move is to arrive unlawfully and wait for a loyalty bonus. Who knew? While British families are juggling rent, energy bills, and the weekly food shop like contestants on a dystopian game show, it’s reassuring to know the Treasury has located a spare £40,000 per head for voluntary goodbyes. May I ask — is there a points card? Ten years of National Insurance contributions and I get a free exit bonus? If so, I believe I’m overdue. In the spirit of fairness and fiscal responsibility, I am not even asking for the full £40,000. I’m trimming £5,000 off to help balance the books. That’s the kind of responsible budgeting I was raised on. If successful, I promise to:    •   Leave via a scheduled flight (economy is fine).    •   Not stage a protest on the runway.    •   And refrain from re-entering on a small boat to see if I qualify twice. All I ask is equal treatment. If departure is now a funded career pathway, I would very much like to submit my CV. Yours in hopeful relocation, A slightly confused taxpayer

@Keir_Starmer So tell me how HMRC managed to tits up my tax for the last year & this year I have 2 pay an extra £800. Im starting on -£800 hardly more in my pocket is it.

Job number one is easing the cost of living pressure that many people still feel. Today’s GDP figures show our economy is growing. That means more money back in your pocket. I know there’s more to do, but we are heading in the right direction.

@ick_real Sausage rolls

what tastes good both hot & cold?? there is nothing 🫩

@elonmuskTN 17 Simple as that 👌

@LFCApproved & outshone the so called super stars at least he was getting shots off.

Gakpo could’ve had 5, don’t tell me he was good.

@packers @WesHod I was in Vegas when it was the steelers vs the packers in the superbowl & the packers were the underdogs. So I got on board that day & haven't looked back.

How did you become a Packer fan? 📬: @WesHod

@AnythingLFC_ Gutted, can't believe it

Heartbreaking news. Diogo Jota has passed away after a car accident in Spain. Lost for words. 😢💔

@creepydotorg Just no need RIP Opie

Who didn’t deserve to die in a movie? 😭 I’ll start:

@Saraya That ain't gorleston beach is it haha

Glampire goes to the beach 🌊

@gamesyouloved I seem to remember 1 of the cheat codes let you have kit from Knight rider on there? hahaha

Age of Empires (1997) One of the greatest real time strategy games of all time

@gamesyouloved @SEGA_OFFICIAL Seems silly now, but. I used to love holding down, then charging him up as a ball to shoot through a row of bots, or collect coins in a loop the loop so simple compared to what you can do on games today but so much fun at the time.

In 1991 I was 17 years old at college with little experience of life. I was a big movie fan too waiting for Robin Hood Prince of Thieves and Point Break to come out that summer. But nothing was to prepare me for Sonic, when the blue blur hit the Mega Drive 33 years ago today 💙

@PokemonGoApp Does anybody take any photos on here just bin the snapshot

Keep the adventures going all summer and capture the moments with #GOsnapshot! 📸🤩

@PushinPetunias @VideoGameHstry @adamhoughts remember just sitting in silence for about 15 minutes after this. Still hard to watch after all these years.

@VideoGameHstry And when they tied the same song into Gears 3 with Dom's death. One of many reasons Gears 1-3 made the Gears franchise one of my all time favorites. Thanks for sharing

Gears of War Mad World commercial (2006)

@fc_belton Clever words 👏

Congratulations @howsie17 for Top Goalscorer for the Vets, winning by 1 goal! #GoldenBoot

@rickygervais No no no, thank you.

Thanks to the 160 million people who made #AfterLife the most watched British comedy in the world 🌍

@hardestgeezer If there just so happens to be a spoons in Tunisia, let me know your table number. You deserve a drink. It's been incredible following your progress over the last year, so thank you & bloody well done.

Action

I have turned adversity into opportunity. I have created inner calm and have learnt to sit in the middle of the storms that turn up. I can help other men do the same. If you are interested in changing your behaviours, please DM me.