Huck Poe

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Huck Poe

Huck Poe

@huckpoe

a weird prop at the bar

Chicago Katılım Kasım 2011
179 Takip Edilen130 Takipçiler
Huck Poe
Huck Poe@huckpoe·
Congrats to the Walgreens at Broadway and Granville for playing a Randy Newman cover by Michael Buble, you've achieved peak muzak
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Huck Poe
Huck Poe@huckpoe·
As long as we're considering making DST permanent, how about switching March over to a 30 day month? It'd help us hourly slobs who have to budget that smaller February paycheck over a long month. The Pope 500 years ago really screwed us on that one.
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Huck Poe
Huck Poe@huckpoe·
Taxes are a government conspiracy to make us forget what year it is again just when we were starting to get it right
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Huck Poe
Huck Poe@huckpoe·
Y'all waste energy arguing about ketchup on hotdogs and pineapple on pizza while you let the real monsters get away with the ultimate crime: using Crispix instead of Chex in puppy chow
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Huck Poe
Huck Poe@huckpoe·
Sure, a nationalized health care system would be great and all, but you just can't beat the efficiency of the private sector, like when my insurance company mails me a letter to remind me that I signed up for paperless billing and communications. @BCBSIL #MedicareForAll
Huck Poe tweet media
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Huck Poe
Huck Poe@huckpoe·
I imagine it's kinda like the Twilight Zone, but with more bean bag chairs
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Huck Poe
Huck Poe@huckpoe·
Bedrooms and bathrooms imply the existence of a Beyond Room, and that's where I wanna be
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Huck Poe
Huck Poe@huckpoe·
Is it just me, or do the worker costumes from Squid Game look HELLA comfy? So many pockets too. I want to wear one casually, mask, disguised voice, and all.
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Huck Poe
Huck Poe@huckpoe·
All historical events have been false flag operations, except for Die Hard With A Vengeance, which really happened, and is the ONLY thing that has EVER really happened
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Huck Poe
Huck Poe@huckpoe·
"That singer sure is loud alright" -Me in the back row, wearing a frosting-stained tux
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Huck Poe
Huck Poe@huckpoe·
It's almost as though its only remaining purpose is to alienate and exclude people
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Huck Poe
Huck Poe@huckpoe·
I don't know how someone can tell whether an opera they're watching is good or bad and at this point I'm too afraid to ask
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Huck Poe
Huck Poe@huckpoe·
I was feeling pretty good today, but then I found out Donald Rumsfeld died. And I felt even better.
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Huck Poe
Huck Poe@huckpoe·
It was prob just a clerical error, but I lol'd imagining @DickDurbin himself reading my email about removing patent restrictions on the vax so less wealthy countries don't fall victim to #Pfizer's profiteering, shaking his fist, and saying "it's those damn kids with their vapes!"
Huck Poe tweet media
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Huck Poe
Huck Poe@huckpoe·
Bank account: $1400 Me: *slams fists on dermatologist's desk* I want an annual skin cancer screening *grits teeth* ADD BACON
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Huck Poe
Huck Poe@huckpoe·
Bank account: $1400 Me: *bursts through door of M&M store* INFRAREEED!!!
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Huck Poe
Huck Poe@huckpoe·
Bank account: $1400 Me: *slams fist on DMV counter* I want a HUNDRED driver's licenses. Gonna make it RAIN
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Huck Poe
Huck Poe@huckpoe·
Bank: $1400 Me: *slams fist on the bar* I want the greenest motherfucking beer you've got
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Huck Poe
Huck Poe@huckpoe·
One funny thing about this whole #potatohead debacle is that potatoes generally reproduce through self-pollination, so have fun explaining that to your kids if you're so concerned about "biology.™"
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