Jessica Collier

Please consider signing this petition: c.org/QH6B2Xrm5C Cutting some of the worst offending websites off at the knees will help a lot of people. There needs to be consequences for enabling rape and trafficking.

The character is just too yummy. 😍😋😍

Me, firing up this week’s episode of Tracker:

I never knew I needed a word so badly in my life. 🤣 Volume up for a clear explanation. 😂

@LAGlobalism @DrClownPhD Yes, married men do live longer than unmarried men. health.harvard.edu/mens-health/ma…

@DrClownPhD So married men ought to live longer than bachelors. Is this so?

It's 100% true. Every time my wife touches me, she gets a response... 😏

@MissSassbox Sooo, can we get a list of songs correlated to their appropriate neurochemicals? Cause I’ve been hooked on the theme song from Slow Horses for a week and I have no idea what it means, lmao.

your brain wants to hear your newest favorite song over & over, not just because you like it, but because it's fixing something

@frankandfree66 @ATRightMovies Came here to say this one. ☝️🤣

@JeremyPirri @deidrejowen Learned something new today, lol. I too thought it looked the same for everyone.

@deidrejowen 1) Brown 2) 45 3) I have astigmatism, meaning my eyes are more football shaped than spherical. I guess it’s mild, as things are blurry without my glasses. But even with them, traffic lights at night SUCK. I never knew this pic was unique—I thought it looked like that for everyone

My 14yo is working on a science research project and looking to expand her data set. Her query: Does eye color affect vision? Anonymous! 1. What color are your eyes? 2. How old are you? 3. Do you have any visual impairment? If so, mild or severe? Comments closing Wed 8pm EST.

@daumenxyz How will people know if they’ve won?

I am going to do something unprecedented In December, I'm giving away $10,000 Every Wednesday for the next 4 weeks, 5 PEOPLE will win $2,500 ($500) each I've been fortunate enough to win, and hopefully I can help 20 people get a fresh start $10,000 to 20 winners First giveaway in 2 days, on Wednesday Don't need to follow or like, just comment to participate Much love, hopefully I can make your Holiday Season a bit better 🎁♥️

@BowTiedBroke …and the giveaway. 😁

Husqvarna sent me a stack of chainsaws to give away because a bear stole mine & Internet went wild. I’m adding a 4 day/3 nt stay to my Smoky Mtn cabin. (Side by side tours, meet Jimmy & me, see old moonshine stills, crazy views). To enter (100% free, no purchase necessary): 1) Follow @BowTiedBroke 2) Comment on THIS post with literally anything (tag friends = extra luck with the dartboard later 👀) Contest runs exactly 24 hours —-> closes tomorrow at 10:00 AM EST At close, @grok will instantly pick 20 random commenters with accounts older than 3 months. Then, I put those 20 names on a dartboard, film one throw, and THAT person wins everything. No bots, no BS, fully transparent. Grok posts the 20 here, the dart decides destiny 🎯 Sorry international followers (not that I have that many) U.S. followers only for this one. Cabin is in Tennessee, chainsaws are heavy, and bears don’t do passports. Let’s go! Drop a reply and let’s see who the Chainsaw stealing bear chooses.

@FAIbecca @shesbonky Twins here too! 🙌👯‍♀️❤️❤️ They’re 18 now. 😱😱

@shesbonky I swear I sometimes feel baby kicks and my youngest are 13 (twins)

if you've been pregnant you know the feeling of a baby kicking is a pretty singular feeling (even in the early stages) but i swear to god i feel phantom baby kicks all the damn time now my youngest kid is 11yrs old

@shesbonky You always post such quality…but dayum, you outdid yourself on this one. 😍😋🤤

H0RNY ACTIVISM pt. 854 Evangelicals: Women have long hair because the bible says their hair is glory unto god. Men aren't attracted to women with short hair just like women aren't attracted to men with long hair. *Sexy Jesus has entered the chat*

@CocoOgre @RespectfulMemes 10/10

@RespectfulMemes Ghost Of Tsushima

@katokimiko444 @RespectfulMemes 10/10

@RespectfulMemes Ghost of Tsushima

@_Future_Ghost_ @RespectfulMemes 10/10 🥰❤️🥰

IF I GET DEMENTIA….. I’d like my family to hang this wish list up on the wall where I live. I want them to remember these things. 1a. Every time you enter the room announce yourself. “Hi Dad - it’s Amanda.” NEVER ask- Do you know who I am??? That causes anxiety. • If I get dementia, I want my friends and family to embrace my reality. • If I think my spouse is still alive, or if I think we’re visiting my parents for dinner, let me believe those things. I’ll be much happier for it. • If I get dementia, don’t argue with me about what is true for me versus what is true for you. • If I get dementia, and I am not sure who you are, do not take it personally. My timeline is confusing to me. • If I get dementia, and can no longer use utensils, do not start feeding me. Instead, switch me to a finger-food diet, and see if I can still feed myself. • If I get dementia, and I am sad or anxious, hold my hand and listen. Do not tell me that my feelings are unfounded. • If I get dementia, I don’t want to be treated like a child. Talk to me like the adult that I am. • If I get dementia, I still want to enjoy the things that I’ve always enjoyed. Help me find a way to exercise, read, and visit with friends. • If I get dementia, ask me to tell you a story from my past. • If I get dementia, and I become agitated, take the time to figure out what is bothering me. • If I get dementia, treat me the way that you would want to be treated. • If I get dementia, make sure that there are plenty of snacks for me in the house. Even now if I don’t eat I get angry, and if I have dementia, I may have trouble explaining what I need. • If I get dementia, don’t talk about me as if I’m not in the room. • If I get dementia, don’t feel guilty if you cannot care for me 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. It’s not your fault, and you’ve done your best. Find someone who can help you, or choose a great new place for me to live. With a bus and activities!! • If I get dementia, and I live in a dementia care community, please visit me often. • If I get dementia, don’t act frustrated if I mix up names, events, or places. Take a deep breath. It’s not my fault. • If I get dementia, make sure I always have my favorite music playing within earshot. • If I get dementia, and I like to pick up items and carry them around, help me return those items to their original place. • If I get dementia, don’t exclude me from parties and family gatherings. • If I get dementia, know that I still like receiving hugs or handshakes. • If I get dementia, remember that I am still the person you know and love.” ᴄᴏᴘʏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴘᴀsᴛᴇ in Honor of someone you know or knew who has dementia. In Honor of all those I know and love and lost who are fighting Dementia/Alzheimer’s.

@iris_seraphina Not gonna lie, dog math would apply pretty well to me too. It’s like, girl math adjacent, lol. Especially the “now you practically hate me” bit. 🤣

Here’s a quick lesson on Dog Math!! 🎾

@SoVeryBritish I finally found my people. 🤗 I feel this SO intensely. Have actually said these exact words to my children. Whatever is wrong with me apparently skipped them, lol.

Earlier today, I had my back to my wife when I heard her say, “Do you want to keep this box?” I froze. Keeping my back turned, I carefully replied, “Please don’t show me the box. I’ll immediately form an emotional attachment to it. Just put it in the bin. Don’t let me see it.” We narrowly missed adding another box to my special box collection in the garage. But I’m sitting here now, thinking, “I wonder what kind of box it was. I wonder what it might have been useful for.”

@shesbonky So. Real. I swear, the people that come up with these things are sadists. Even if the laundry gods align and you actually own the correct color or themed item of clothing AND it’s clean, good luck getting a kid who is in their “Only Green Food/Clothes/Colors” phase to wear it.

11: it's red ribbon week at school so tomorrow i have to wear a— ME: oh my god i would rather you do drugs than the manic wardrobe schedule of red ribbon week #fuckredribbonweek

@Georgebabs_ spotify.link/7nwvwUF7JXb