Dave

@SRuhle My wife did it yesterday w her 2nd grade class in Bridgeport CT. Oreos vs Chips Ahoy, the kids had to make up and present positions on why you should vote for either one, she made up a little voting booth. Oreos won by a hair.

Remember when we used to have mock election day in schools- students would actually vote, there would be a count, results & they'd teach about how the process works - and kids would have to research who rhey were voting for a why. It was a fun, educational & memorable exercise... How exactly would that work today?

@ReillyRick Did they stop the game to honor him?

Congrats to Bronny James on his first basket in the NBA. He and his dad are now the greatest father/son tandem ever with a combined 40,582 points.

Grimace walks into a bar: "Gimmee a scotch and Soto."

@acaseofthegolf1 @DPWorldTour

Alright enough with all that. One week till I go to Spain for @DPWorldTour Q-school! Proper Q-school, 6 round gauntlet, players from all over the world. Great stories, vets, rising stars. Can. Not. Wait.

@atrupar Telling that Trump and Goldwater are the only ones not smiling

choose your fighter

@Sean_Zak Xander?

Name this perfectly-adequate-in-all-categories pro golfer

@BradleyWhitford @RepNancyMace I mean just to be nakedly obtuse like that. Please tell me the people of her district see thru the BS.

You voted against it. You’re a disgrace @RepNancyMace.

@MikeLupica Meteor

@EmbryEthan It must be exhausting to have to strain that hard and jump thru so many hoops to twist yourself into a pretzel defending and sanewashing what thet jackass says. Every single day.

@SimonWDC I’m hearing Elvis Costello singing ‘he was skippin like a dipshit’ 🤣

I like dipshit way more than weird.

@acaseofthegolf1 Healthy-ish is great. Real question is - has it made yiur life any better? And by that I mean - has your game improved since eating healthy-ish? Priorities dude..

If you're going on a diet and people say “it gets easier the longer you do it” they are flat out lying to you. We have been eating healthy(ish) for over a year. This is my lunch today. And all I want is some f*cking pizza or a whopper.

@RexChapman On the other hand, he touched a black person, so maybe all isn’t lost?

@ChrisMurphyCT Senator, the sadder part is that Eric is the one that thinks he’s actually ever held a real job.

This is how they think. A custodian isn’t a real job. A bus driver isn’t a real job. A teacher isn’t a real job. A factory worker isn’t a real job. A police officer isn’t a real job. This is how they think. That you’re all just taking from them.

@RexChapman One is mentioned in a document written 237 years ago so it’s considered noble by white people. The other is usually filled with brown/black people so it’s not so noble.

@TheeThomasB Ironically, they look like migrants, crossing the Southern Border

@Nick_Offerman @MuellerSheWrote Never seen those ‘independent’ studies that show the millions of votes that were stolen from Trump by burying a dubious story that no one except Fox viewers cared about.

How can you see anything but a total horseshit artist

@AlexMyers3 So she’s one ahead of you?

Back-to-back holes-in-one for Julia today! (Not pictured: She wasn’t as thrilled when I told her she had to buy drinks.)

@EmbryEthan Well, don’t give him good ideas!