Joel Lopez | Save Your Marriage@TheeJoelLopez
27 years ago this month, I met my wife on a cruise I wasn't supposed to be on.
So many things had to go right, things that weren't even in my hands, for us to ever cross paths.
My family didn't travel. We didn't go on vacations or do road trips.
When my parents had time off and we were out of school we'd go down to Mexico to visit family, that was it.
So when two of my friends' families planned a cruise, I wasn't even part of the conversation. I didn't know anything about it until they invited me.
There was one spot left and I was the third choice for it.
I found out years later that two other friends were asked before me and both said no.
That's why they asked me.
The school I met them at? I wasn't even supposed to be there either. We used my uncle's address to get me in.
One decision my family made put me in the same hallways as them.
There was a problem.
My family didn't have money for something like this.
But my grandpa, without ever making a big deal of it, had been putting a little money into my account every week.
I'd been saving that money plus what I made from working the summer before with one goal: buy a car.
When they invited me I thought about it.
On one hand the car that I knew I would need and the sense of accomplishment of making my first big purchase and the independence that came with it.
On the other hand, a cruise was something I'd never done or anyone in my family.
I asked myself one question: Will I eventually buy a car in my life?
Yes.
Will I ever have a chance like this again?
No.
So I said yes and spent my life savings.
The day before I left, we were at my grandparents' house.
We had family that lived around the corner from them also and they were there too.
As we were saying goodbye and walking out the door my Tía said "You're going to meet your wife on that cruise."
I laughed. "Yeah right," I said.
And I'm thinking in my head, "You're crazy. I'm still in high school. I don't have any business with a wife, I'm just trying to play football and I don't even have a car." (you have to have a car to have a wife, they like that. I knew this in high school)
I got on that boat.
And I met her on the first night.
So many things had to happen just right.
My family had to use my uncle's address.
That put me in the right school.
That put me next to the right friends.
Those friends had to invite two other guys first, guys who both had to say no.
My grandpa had to be the kind of man who invested in his grandson.
I had to be willing to spend what I saved on an experience instead of a thing.
Every single one of those dominoes had to fall.
And most were out of my control.
I don't believe in coincidences.
Coincidence is what you call it when one or two things line up. This wasn't one or two things.
Coincidence doesn't have enough zeros to cover it.
This wasn't luck. This was a path being laid out before I even knew I was walking on it.
The Bible in Malachi talks about the windows of Heaven opening.
I believe those are windows of opportunity, and they don't stay open forever.
They open and you're there or you miss them.
That cruise was a window.
I could have said no, stayed home and saved my money.
Bought a car and I never would have crossed paths with her ever in my life.
I had to be on that boat at that exact time.
There are 6 beautiful kids because of it.
And now I spend more in a month at Costco than I did for that cruise.
A life I couldn't have imagined standing in my grandparents' living room laughing at my Tía.
All those little things.
All those moments that felt ordinary or even inconvenient at the time.
They were all leading somewhere.
God is good.
Thank you Lord.
Some old book:
He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD.
It's true.