Oyster Jay

adulting is about experiencing the worst thing you can imagine & then having to go to work

there are literally just 3 questions on the canadian census: are you married, transgender, or french

Destroy all cruise ships

the humiliation ritual of having to be nice to a creepy man because you don’t want him to kill you

when i'm embarrassed about something that i did while drunk, but then i remember who raised me #rhony

we literally live in a dystopian world where beautiful girls are forced to use excel

there is a crush recession... there is nobody to fancy...

Ojalá Justin Bieber se de cuenta de que no estoy en Coachella y lo cancele

"are you getting your period?" god forbid im just evil

sorry i can’t hang, i need to watch my shows and then go on a walk listening to podcasts recapping my shows and then go on reddit and read about my shows. booked and busy!

@p1ar23 ❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️

Putting on lip liner to walk 10,000 steps

Losing an hour of time/sleep on International Women's Day feels like the most on brand thing this world has to offer.

I do genuinely believe that watching any real housewives franchise will teach you so much about female friendship dynamics to the point that you’ll never have to deal with insecure mean girls again

@teeschmidt Muscle mami…. Jail

I relate to Wuthering Heights because I too plan on returning to my hometown mysteriously rich, handsome and in a skin tight wet blouse to cause havoc on my ex in a large field

I am halfway through Wuthering Heights, the novel, and it is infinitely weirder and more disturbing than I anticipated, and I'm having such a good time reading it I am actively avoiding spoilers for a book that was published in 1847

kyle and amanda on summer house is like some of the most contempt i’ve seen a couple display on reality tv and im not joking

Obsessed with this Beckham drama because PR crisis deflection strategy is going to get us Spice Girls reunion at the Sphere