Kelley S

@cringycait Good thing we don't celebrate Paczki Day until Feb. 13 in this country. Also, the singular of paczki is paczek.

“Astronauts have been warned against masturbating in space over fears female astronauts could get impregnated by stray fluids.” Here @nypost @NASA @ConanOBrien I fixed it for you.

Dem leaders must tell voters the plan: What’s the *actual* need? Which specific seats are we focused on? WHAT votes do we need & WHERE (what states + races?) And, what’s the return? What is Biden/Congress ACTUALLY willing+able to do at 52/60 seats? Be honest. Details motivate

For the moments when we DO insist on elections, we must be PRECISE with what we need and we will do with that power: How many seats does the party need to Codify Roe? Dems must SAY THAT. Not just “go vote” or “give us $6 to win.” That is demoralizing, losing, unfocused nonsense

To Cait: from preschool to senior, we’ve been so proud to watch you grow. Congratulations on your graduation and all of your accomplishments! #ucs22 #GLKUAIS #MacalesterCollege

@ChipotleTweets got guac. It’s brown throughout. Pretty gross. Except I can’t call or message you to tell you because you only accept orders, not handle complaints. Had no idea your customer service was nonexistent.

When we say that there is a trans genocide going on, this is what we are talking about. It's been slowly bubbling and percolating to the surface, and in the enclaves of anti-trans governments, they are deciding now is their time to act.

Greg Abbot has officially directed Family and Protective Services to begin investigating all trans children in Texas and prosecuting their parents as child abusers. He has also instructed all teachers, doctors, and caregivers to begin reporting any trans students they see.

You don’t get the full experience until you see it live! #ncaavb #finalfour #nationwide

@LibGrl74 I hate to say it but you’ll get used to it. What you don’t want are the phone calls because that indicates close contact.

@cringycait 😂

"Trust the science" wrote the Q-Anon sympathizer (who believes wildfires are caused by Jewish Space Lasers) on a sign outside her office outlining a false gender binary, which has never existed since the beginning of time.

Chef’s kiss for this headline

@StabHappy01 @benandjerrys @BruceLeeJackson They make dairy free ice creams. They’re excellent.

@benandjerrys @BruceLeeJackson The real question here. Do you make lactose free products for those who will now want to support your business and enjoy the yummy flavor without the negative side effects?

Yesterday was not a protest—it was a riot to uphold white supremacy. (1/8)

@cringycait PEOPLE PAY MONEY TO LEARN FROM ME!!

@cringycait Because you get to take interacting classes and learn cool stuff from people like me. 😎

Just to be clear: #damnrightimadoctor otherwise, the student loan folks have some ‘splaining to do.

@kevtagion Rufus Wainwright’s cover of “Hallelujah”

What song gives you the chills every time you hear it??

Seeing Mike Pence have to swear in a Democrat senator while a bisexual woman in a purple wig and zebra print coat holds the Bible is EXTREMELY pleasing to me