Goravvv
892 posts
Goravvv retweetledi
How to tell what phase of life a girl is in:
Posting thirst traps = recently single
Posting 5 stories a day and scrolling through so see if he saw it = she’s dating a guy who doesn’t like her
She suddenly starts posting home cooked meals, sourdough, and little farmer’s market hauls = she wants a man to know she’s wifey now even though she used to rail lines till 5am
If she’s doing Pilates every single day = she’s either in love, heartbroken, or unemployed. (sometimes all 3, depends what time the class is)
If she’s training for a marathon = he absolutely fucked her up
If she suddenly stops posting = new man
If she starts talking about freezing her eggs at dinner = hinge date pushed her into a full existential crisis
If she starts saying she’s in her “soft girl era,” = had a psychological collapse and hired a new therapist/Pilates instructor in the same week
Murray Hill Guy@MurrayHillGuy1
How to tell what phase of life a guy is in: If he’s golfing every weekend, he hates his girlfriend/wife If he’s blacking out every Friday/Saturday, violently single and stuck in college If he’s training for a marathon, a breakup changed him fundamentally If he moved to Austin/Miami, NYC defeated him If he suddenly got into watches, he’s doing well at his job and that’s his priority in life If he’s posting jazz bars and espresso martinis, he’s obsessed with his ex and wants her attention If he suddenly stops tweeting/posting, definitely a new girlfriend If he bought a pickleball paddle, his life peaked 6 months ago. Cooked If he’s doing Hyrox, he thinks he’s better than everyone else, but isn’t
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