isaac

Well, it looks like the original video has been removed from X. Good job I had a backup of classic Farage.

I am settling in for a showing of ‘Melania’ and the theater is PACKED! Earlier, a bystander asked if I was heading in to see Avatar, and I stopped dead in my tracks. “Avatar? No, son,” I curtly replied. “I don’t watch woke movies. I’m here to see the groundbreaking documentary about our incredibly talented First Lady.” The man’s two little girls began jumping up and down, pulling on his sleeve, and begging, “Daddy, we want to see Melania!” “But. But…” he stammered, “I thought you girls wanted to see Zootopia 2?” “No, no, NO,” they said, now nearly shouting. “We want to see Melania!! She is the most beautiful First Lady EVER.” Their father was scrambling, stressed out, and disoriented. “Girls, I’m afraid you aren’t the only ones who are captivated by President Trump and his beautiful wife,” I said, kneeling to get on their level. “Virtually everyone in this theater is here for the 7:30 PM showing, and it’s been sold out for days.” Tears began to well up in their eyes. “But…” I said in a hushed tone, “I happen to have a few extra tickets with me, and I’d like you and your dad to have them.” They jumped for joy and began hugging their father. He looked relieved as he wiped the sweat off his brow with a smile. I handed him the tickets and pulled him close. “Raise these girls right,” I whispered. “Teach them to be classy conservative women of faith like Melania, don’t let them become like Meghan Markle. Capisce?” He hugged me and thanked me profusely. “What are you going to do now?” He asked. “Don’t worry about me, son,” I told him, with a twinkle in my eye. “I’ve already got tickets to the next showing.”

There’s an entire season of Curb in Larry going to a Jets game with the wrong guy and ending up in the Epstein Files

@iamtomskinner Care to elaborate?

As most of you will have seen in the papers, I won’t be at the final of Strictly Come Dancing tonight. First thing I wanna say is this…. I spoke with my lovely dance partner, Amy Dowden to make sure she was okay with me not attending. She’s a good person and a good friend now, I’d never let her down. When I got given the opportunity to do Strictly back in April, I was buzzing. Not because I can dance…. I can’t. But because i really wanted to test myself and Learn something completely out of my comfort zone. On the night I left the show, I received an anonymous email claiming to be from a BBC exec with stats, saying I’d received far more votes than it appeared and it wasn’t right. I’ve since had the email independently verified. That same email mentioned the BBC was very angry an nervous simply because I had met JD Vance (USA VICE PRESIDENT). Let me be clear, I’m not a political bloke. Never have been. I just love my country and am patriotic. I’ve been made out by the press to be this political figure. If anyone was to get an opportunity like what I did, they would have taken it. I still think it is mad that a man like me who sells mattresses out of a van can call someone that senior in the world’s politics a friend now. I have asked to see the official voting figures to back up the ones I was sent in the email but was told they couldn’t be shown to me. And have never been shown in the history of the show. I have spoke about the email I had received to senior people and the BBC welfare team, who btw I genuinely respect. And they was the ones who advised me to get legal advice because of how unfair it all was. (This was not my idea) There were also smaller things that added to the feeling. Everyone received a welcome gift on the show….. skincare bits, face masks, that sort of thing. Mine was the only one that “Got Stolen” apparently. On its own, it’s nothing…. but added to everything else, it felt strange. I have been made out to be someone I actually am not simply because I took part in this show. The views were formed from media stories over the summer that simply wasn’t true or exaggerated. It ain’t fair what has happened to me and my family. I also want to say this carefully. After receiving this information and having it verified, a very senior BBC figure has since resigned. I’m not saying that had anything to do with me, but it did feel bizarre. Also the main hosts stepped down the following week. Again, I’m not saying it has anything to do with me. It’s just all very coincidental. I’m just being honest. I didn’t want any of this in the press either. A lot of what’s been written has been exaggerated or untrue about me and I’ve found it hard to take in over the past few months. This is my life, and it’s not nice what has been said about me if I’m honest. What I do find strange is that after a private Zoom call with BBC executives on Wednesday night about going forward, this was national news by Thursday morning. That tells me there’s been a leak. Because it ain’t come from me to be in the press. (It might be from the same person who sent me the email🤔) …..I didn’t want this to be national news, in fact I didn’t want any of this. But now I’m writing a statement so people know the truth as to why I’m not attending, I don’t want people thinking I am bitter when I ain’t. I don’t want more stories being wrote that ain’t true. I’m not kicking off for attention. I’m not saying I should’ve won either. I was rubbish at dancing😂 we all know that. But love me or hate me you do have to appreciate the massive following I have, I can’t even walk into the local Tesco without getting stopped for selfies. I just believe in fairness and respect. I wish every dancer tonight the very best. They’ve worked their socks off and they deserve their moment. As for me I’ve got fish to sell on my stall and a family I love more than anything. Thank you for the love as Always. Bosh❤️

@BunnyJugs Pee Wee Herman really fell off man

@chatswithem Take your meds

U.K. Gov " we are going to trial dimming the sun" U.K. every day - no sun Nov 1 🌫️ 2 🌤️ 3 🌫️ 4 🌫️ 5 🌫️ 6- 🌫️ 7- 🌫️ 8- 🌫️ supposed to be SUNNY!!!! 9- 🌫️ 10 🌫️ (2 hrs of ⛅️ in am) 11 🌫️ 12 🌧️ ☔️ 13 🌫️ 14 🌫️ 15 🌫️

@antmiddleton Very articulate!

You haven’t seen nothing yet Khan! 🇬🇧🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿

He’s lying. The statistics - including his own government and own FBI’s statistics - say the exact opposite. Well, for now. I’m sure they’ll doctor them going forward like they plan to do for the jobs numbers.

@DawnSl44 Gimps

Must be nice being the smartest member of GB News

Me when I finally get my lobotomy

Chilled weekend

@WindsorDebs What year was the lobotomy?

Can’t sleep. Really bad ringing in my ears. It’s 02:32. No surprise to look outside and see why.

"I’m struggling to think of any other recent event in the UK where a mob has called for the death of human beings."

"I don't feel safe at Glastonbury" pic.twitter.com/mknqVKW39X

Impeach the President

Useful info this morning: 🇮🇷has 0 nuclear weapons 🇮🇱 has up to 500 nuclear weapons 🇮🇷 has signed the non-proliferation treaty 🇮🇱refuses to sign non-proliferation treaty 🇮🇷 has welcomed IAEA international observers to inspect its nuclear programme 🇮🇱 has refused IAEA oversight