Mif_the_human_hawk

Now I’m listening to this legend. Chill out. open.spotify.com/track/4Qx0r08Y…

I’m listening to rubber band man by TI. Fuck you!

@scentedgladbag Youre awesome pat!!! 💪

Ryan Williams eye black… “Kill Everybody”

I wish us normies could request a trade. Make it my bosses problem to find me a new place to work.

Fuck the Astros

I’m sick and tired of thinking I lost a nalgene and then finding it the next day. I can’t take this heartbreak anymore. It’s draining me.

Baked lays don’t miss man. They’re underrated. The cheddar sour cream, the bbq… they’re good. Edibles are good too. And bagels. I like Colorado too. This place is p cool.

Anyway, looking forward to Chinese food and beers tonight.

I got a job with the NPS for the cool t shirts and to lose weight and that ain’t no shit. I’m quitting after 15 pounds

Aubs eat boogers. I have video evidence.

I been sleeping on baby powder dog. It’s elite. And I don’t say that about everything aight.

Nobody: Me:

@ImCurn WOW

@mifhimself RIPTYD

I’m going to rip my dick off the day that Saban retires. I swear to god.

After that fat Alabama L

WHOOOOPS

Been on the toilet for 20 min playing with Snapchat filters

If you shower naked, you need Jesus. #layerup