whackyinflatableflailingtubeman

I get paid to slowly poison people

I just got a can of air duster for it’s actual purpose and it felt more sketchy than any drug deal I’ve done

Overheard someone say “pump Haus just doesn’t like people who are good at their jobs” and I fucking cackled

STOP SAYING PEOPLE DON'T OWE EACH OTHER ANYTHING!!! we owe each other community. we owe each other love. we owe each other safety. we owe each other support. individualism is destroying us.

Server had to ask if I was being serious about my round of rumple at 1pm

@NobsjustBS It’s got a little flavor for everyone haha quite the conversation piece

I’m not sure who needs this more, Casey or Kelso

My safe word is “last call”

He’s got my vote

@DMVUofficial Brother you make beautiful music no matter the genre and I appreciate it all

Also for the first time in my life my chill shit outplayed my hype shit (which is the goal) ((but when you are competing with yourself you win no matter what lol))

All my homies hate Nebraska

@_ClintDavis @whiskeyroadcf You gotta start doing pictures

BLACK BEAN SMOKED PORK SWEET POTATO SOUP from @whiskeyroadcf they don’t miss w/ their soup. The shredded pork had AMAZING flavor, black beans top off any good soup, the sweet potato was just an added bonus.Good chunks, seasoning and flavor was top notch. 8.7/10. It’s SOUP SEASON!

It’s soup szn

If orange chicken is your go to Chinese dish you have issues

Tired of my brain

@NobsjustBS We tried this a few years ago it was kinda fun

My shower length is directly correlated to my mental health

Should bartenders have to swear to the Hippocratic oath yes or no

Fuck a zodiac what’s your favorite moon phase

autumn is in the air i’m decaying with the leaves