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@Rebel_Loo “Step 1: Break into comics with your own unique style. Step 2: Draw Wolverine stabbing out Juggernaut’s eye. Step 47: Start your own multi-million dollar comic/toy company.”

@EITMonline He gave himself 110% effort. #SelfCare

‘Fit’ man suffers horrific artery TEAR triggering fatal heart emergency – after masturbating. the-sun.com/health/1262514…

@ModestTeacher This is an example of why Pintrest in the wrong hands is bad.

If my daughter’s future husband does this to her or my granddaughters he can not only have peace but he can rest in peace.

@Espngreeny A scrappy team that just finds ways to win is the epitome of the kind of team nobody wants to face in the first round of playoffs.

Lions 33 Saints 28 Detroit huge start and then held on for dear life. Three weeks ago I thought they were a legit NFC contender. Much less convinced now.

@damnyouwillis I got a rock.

oh no

Our favorite poet/mercenary, Major Bludd, is here to supply Cobra support #WonderCon #Cosplay #GIJoe

Was I at one point the CEO of a dice company? YES. Do I current possess a Bailey-esque hoard of rollbois? YES. Do dice exist with my actual handwriting on them? YES. Does that matter when arguing with Brennan? NO! NO GOD BUT MATH. 🙏🏾

@ModestTeacher Either alphabetical, picked my own seat, or more often as a military brat showing up in the middle of the school year, whichever seat was still available.

As a kid, were you a “buffer” in the seating chart?

@MicaBurton Wait, what about- Oh my?!

29-year-old woman who allegedly tried to enroll in N.J. high school is a Rutgers grad nj.com/news/2023/01/2…

@LethalityJane There were years where just getting a tree up or being in the spirit was a struggle. If the worst problem anyone has this time of year is too many ornaments, you’re pretty lucky. I have to remind myself of that.

@GeorgeTakei @MarkHamill Well now I want to watch Empire Strikes Back with Spanish captions on.

In Spanish, they often put the subject after the verb. “Me encanta la musica!” So my question is, how does Yoda speak in Spanish? Does he say, “La musica, me encanta!” @MarkHamill, any thoughts?

@LethalityJane It is pretty much the Only way to watch a Mets game and not have a heart attack.

@ahermitforhire Wife: “R u putting pumpkin spices in your-“ Me: “Yup!” Her: “It is waaay too Earl-“ Me: “Nope!” #PinkyUp #Sippysip

@SamSykesSwears Cowabunga, mah dude!

the unending cycle of new factions being created to fight new battles on twitter every other day is exhausting but in my bones I know that if society ever splits based on which ninja turtle they most relate to, I and the other Michaelangelos will face a bitter and desperate earth

@yak_face Oh, I see they’re sticking with the maine characters.

@ahermitforhire We got a new family game last week and the directions was a video link. So instead of reading off 10 steps, we had to watch a 5 minute video of actors pretending to have fun.

@Hondo_n_Chief *taps mic* Your mom! *drops mic*

@Hondo_n_Chief I was just telling folks of all the shows I binge it is the hardest to skip for me. It is such goofy fun.