Paul Blumenstein

@Noahpinion I’ve never had that experience at SFO. Also, with the regular line you often encounter less-seasoned travelers who overthink the TSA requirements and hold up the line while removing everything - watch, wedding ring, pocket change - and putting each item in its own plastic tray.

Just breezing through SFO security in the regular line, while all the TSA Pre-Check and Clear people line up around the corner. Shoulda taken game theory, folks

@fmanjoo @elonmusk Kind of like subscribing to Playboy for the articles, but non-ironically.

I want to get twitter blue for the Nuzzel/daily top links feature — but I don’t want the check, lol. Is it possible to subscribe to Blue and no check? Cc @elonmusk

@trevorloy The best that can be said about it is that it will make us all forget about the Pontiac Aztek.

@LEBassett Satire is truly dead.

One of the statues in Crow’s dictator garden is Romania’s Nicolae Ceausescu, who imposed a total abortion ban enforced by monthly gynecological exams. So it makes sense that the man would be a big fan of one of the Supreme Court justices who voted to overturn Roe v. Wade.

The Republican megadonor who’s been bankrolling Clarence Thomas reportedly collects Nazi memorabilia, including two Hitler paintings and a signed copy of Mein Kampf, and has a garden full of dictator statues jezebel.com/billionaire-ba…

@DIRECTV @bradengw That’s how Michael Corleone rationalized murder in The Godfather II.

@bradengw Hi Gary. We'd like to have you in our family. This is strictly a business agreement. Our position was based on economics, not politics or ideology. We always have more options for our customers, visit directv.com for more information. DIRECTV is here to help. ^MariaO

The nearly two month long dispute between Newsmax and DirecTV is over: The two companies reached a new carriage deal last night and the channel will be back on DirecTV lineups today

@jdesmondharris The fiancée's initial reaction is understandable, but her rigid unwillingness to see things in a different light, given the unusual circumstances, is a red flag that should lead to conversations about whether this marriage will be a relationship of mutual trust and respect.

🚨 Help me out and I'll quote a few people in my response! 🚨 slate.com/human-interest…

@drvolts @speechboy71 They do have a couple of pale ales on the menu - oh, wait, i just remembered that pale ales all taste like IPAs now.

13 IPAs on a single menu!! 13 over hoppy, crap beers. This is a bigger crisis than the balloon

@trevorloy @pt Lemme guess: Scient?

One of my first Bay Area memories, having showed up in the dot com bust, was visiting a friend’s house who had a garage full of Aeron chairs because her startup couldn’t make payroll and so that was her severance. It’s a good life, but it’s not for everybody.

@jduffyrice Never before have I unfollowed a person so quickly after following him. As terrible a thing as it is to say, I hope he is having a mental health crisis rather than something less fixable like simply being an asshole.

@jdesmondharris The comment by the Black colleague opened the door wide open for the writer to confront the matter head-on. If she lets the matter slide, maybe it will blow over, but more likely the colleague will view it as tacit (and racially motivated) acceptance of a rift between them.

🚨This person deserves an answer but I got a headache reading the letter so please do my job for me. I'll quote a few ideas in my response 🚨

@veloracermike @ThatEricAlper Did you soil your armor?

@ThatEricAlper The first time I saw the rabbit attack in Monty Python and the Holy Grail. I couldn't breathe I was laughing so hard.

@themaxburns This has to be a setup arranged by Sacha Baron Cohen. There is no other logical explanation.

@drvolts @joinmastodon If it has a steep learning curve, it doesn’t matter if I can become proficient in it; it’s never going to attract the kind of critical mass that makes a social network worth spending time on.

@drvolts The email reminded me of the phrase, “The beatings will continue until morale improves.”

@nlewis1111 @drvolts Sure, if the wingnut caucus were capable of thinking strategically. But if you compare the level of crazy in this caucus with the version that impeached Clinton, it’s hard to imagine McCarthy surviving as Speaker if he doesn’t allow impeachment to go forward.

@drvolts Exactly! Assuming the GOP takes the house, nothing is going to boost Biden's reelection chances like Jim Jordan managing the impeachment proceedings surrounding Hunter's laptop.

@gluonspring @B_Nied @golikehellmachi 🖐

@ajambiel @Toyota Whenever I check NextDoor (which I do as infrequently as possible!), there seems to be at least one post about catalytic converter theft, and it’s always a Prius. Any idea why Priuses seem to be the most popular target?

Prius owner says there’s an untold story about catalytic converter thefts: Roadshow We have 100 days so and have at least another 75 days to go per @toyota #toyotacatalyticconverter mercurynews.com/2022/10/14/her…

@ElieNYC As for the others, whatever Hell is like, having to spend eternity in the company of He Who Shall Not Be Named will be punishment enough.

God has seen fit to test me and my willingness to not speak ill of the dead these last few days. I shall not falter… mainly because I’m saving all my sin points for when the head MAGA clown goes to Hell.

Imagine being in a crowded bar when the TV shows your team scoring the winning basket at the buzzer, except the stakes aren’t some playoff series but the survival of your country as an independent nation. (Video clip best watched with the sound on.)