Peter Lyons

@SarahWhoIsLarge Pretty good catch-all

Trying to check the price of a few things I got at hobby lobby and the first item is literally just labeled “art”

@SarahWhoIsLarge THREE people and THREE CATS WHO PARTY ALL NIGHT.

How is this one day of dishes for two people. Absurd

@SarahWhoIsLarge @elonmusk I like daylight savings time, because I like having long, warm summer evenings free after work. But if people are gonna push the issue, I guess I can give up standard time.

@elonmusk DOGE should end daylight savings. It’s a glaring inefficiency in the country. Completely arbitrary shift of our clocks that only serves to make the entire country slightly sleep depraved for a day. Most people hate it. For real, why are we still doing this.

@SarahWhoIsLarge Typical dude response. 🤷‍♂️

Had a dream that I left my baby at a daycare for a few hours and when I got her back, her limbs were Popeye proportions. Like big chunky forearm, little teeny bicep, kinda lanky. I asked my husband if we should call a doctor and he was like “nah, she looks fine to me”

@SarahWhoIsLarge For the same reason we have its and it’s… so you have to pause and think for a minute which is which. When I was a kid a had absolutely the WORST time with to and too. They should have just told me I could remember that “too” has too many “o”s.

Why is it whose and not who’s

@SarahWhoIsLarge Yeah these are hilarious!

“The template for a mammal” really got me

@SarahWhoIsLarge Yeah! Although I think most of my podcasts are non-fiction, by a lot.

Why is it that when you say you read books people generally assume fiction but if you say you listen to podcasts they generally assume nonfiction

@SarahWhoIsLarge YAAAAAAY!!!!!

And when the gender results finally came in, they were paired with a lot of other results so it was more frantic scrolling past hemoglobin, cholesterol, blood sugar, sciency crap I know nothing about and finally: gender of fetus - female I must have read that line a dozen times

The gender reveal party for my daughter was getting a blood test and then having a small heart attack every time my phone got a notification for two weeks.

@SarahWhoIsLarge Because it’s a FORT!

Weeping willow has got to be the most fun tree. Gotta get one of those when I have a permanent yard

@SarahWhoIsLarge I don’t even know what you’re talking about. Were you the only one who knew of this feature? Perhaps they just forgot to keep it.

In a recent update Apple removed a feature where you could drag a file from a regular finder window into a “select file” dialogue box to navigate to that file and it’s driving me crazy. I’m spending like twice as much time digging in files

@SarahWhoIsLarge Nested!

How are you actually supposed to store Tupperware

@SarahWhoIsLarge AI might be getting better, but, yeah…

You know an account is a content farm when the caption for a video is mind numbingly stupid. You watch a tutorial for mashed potatoes and the caption is “I didn’t know you could cook these.”

@SarahWhoIsLarge Well, the binky tether is a good start, thanks to the hard work of researchers and industrial designers around the world.

I want to talk about a serious issue facing our society: when babies yawn, they often drop their binky. Hundreds of millions of babies face this issue every day, yet no research has ever been published on the topic. Awareness is low. How long will our children suffer?

@SarahWhoIsLarge A good one when you don’t have all day.

New Lego set dropped: frog in the mud

@SarahWhoIsLarge Ugh

Our ancestors warned us and we didn’t listen youtu.be/f2picMQC-9E?si…

@SarahWhoIsLarge @hoshizorarock I hope you didn’t start the war already… it’s April NOT fools day now and it’s all gonna be okay.

@hoshizorarock I will not be staying calm. This is WAR

アメリカ人の皆さん 落ち着いて聞いてください 法律で今日からチーズは禁止です。

@SarahWhoIsLarge @lunarfq Sarah you are literally the ONLY reason I venture into this cesspool of “X”! And as long as I don’t stray from your posts, I know it’s all gonna be okay. No nazis, no porn, no conspiracy theories, no rage bait.

@lunarfq That is my reality

would you still tweet if u got zero likes on all ur posts?

@SarahWhoIsLarge @otokyo__ Mimosa FTW!

@otokyo__ Tomato soup Mimosa Curried lentils Mango Shrimp

I need a name for an orange kitten. Anything but Ginger

@SarahWhoIsLarge @_CeeDeeThree This is a problem that can be solved by turning off dynamic volume controls. Ask your dad or Google for help!

@_CeeDeeThree My phone is getting old and now adjusts the volume on its own. Most annoying thing in the world

Am i the only one who get mad when the brightness on their phone go up on its own?

@SarahWhoIsLarge @stfnigg How oddly specific, Sarah. It sounds like perhaps you’re drawing on your own trauma here?

@stfnigg This is the deer content our youth need. Normalize frolicking on the beach instead of into the side of a moving car.

anyway here’s the most carefree deer in the world prancing along the beach at dawn 🦌