rachel

Can't wait to get really old and drive my car into the side of a Dairy Queen

u gotta stop acting all surprised when a guy is the worst person ever

as a beautiful woman, i shouldn’t know what sharepoint is

Hey bro are u free I wanna kill u later

computa help me

josh allen

“i asked chatgpt—” okay well i asked the stray cat outside my house and he blinked at me slowly and said you’re a lost cause

Josh Allen.

what i do on the calculator app is between me And God

Stopping for gas on the way home from work feels like getting shot at

DeeDee MegaDooDoo

“Are u okay?” No it’s literally Monday every 15 minutes

(Making small talk) who are you

donating my brain to science so y’all can study a real bitch

ICE agent shooting me in the head because my toothpaste is too big

it’s still fuck ice fuck donald trump and fuck you if you voted for him

I do not understand the whole face the shower vs face away debate, i'm in the shower twirling round like a fuckin kebab??

i can't believe the bugs about to come back i'm already irritated