Super Seahawk

i like bitches who like me, i don't try to convince bitches who don't like me to like me

Imagine attracting your whole soulmate and then fumbling them bc of self sabotage. Brutal.

Bro really came back after an hour 😭😂

This would put a smile on every man’s face 😍😋

I’ve been a cop for 15 years. I pulled a guy over last night. He was doing 85 in a 55. Weaving. I walked up to the window ready to write a reckless driving ticket. Maybe even take him in. When he rolled down the window, he wasn't drunk. He was shaking. "My daughter," he gasped. "She's at Children's Hospital. The chemo isn't working. They called... they said I need to hurry." I looked at his eyes. You can’t fake that kind of terror. I folded my ticket book. "Follow me," I said. I got back in my cruiser, flipped on the lights and sirens, and I escorted him the 20 miles to the hospital. I cleared every intersection for him. We made a 30-minute trip in 15. He ran inside without looking back. I waited in the parking lot for an hour. Just in case. He came out later, saw me, and walked over. He looked hollowed out. "Did I make it?" I asked. "Yeah," he whispered. "I got to hold her hand while she went. You got me there." He tried to shake my hand, but he collapsed into my arms instead. Sometimes, to serve and protect means breaking the speed limit. Anonymous

LeBron after hearing he’s played against 37% of all NBA players in history: “You think that makes me feel good? It made me feel worse… I played against 25 father-son duos.” 💀 (h/t @KillaKreww)

British Columbia is requiring a death certificate for my great-grandfather before releasing his birth certificate to me. The man was born in 1893. I feel like that's sufficient proof that he's dead.

My bf is so irritating😭. I had an attitude this morning and he asked me

Met the LOML but i owed Karma 💔

Pilate knew Jesus was innocent. He killed him anyway because the crowd was loud and his position was fragile. Men with fragile positions and loud crowds behind them are the most dangerous people in any era.

April fools

If you pay attention you’ll realize God often speaks to you through others, many times in the most subtle ways like slipping in just the right word or phrase at the exact moment you needed to hear it

I need them to pass me around like a blunt until i fucking die

A coworker died yesterday morning😭. ​HR knew by 9 :00 AM, but they kept us working all day. They finally told us around 4 :30 PM, then had the nerve to say, "You can head home early if you need to"—knowing we all finish at 5: 00 PM anyway. ​This morning, it’s back to "business as usual." Some of my friends are literally sobbing at their desks, but they’re expected to work and be productive. No time to grieve. ​It’s a cold reality. Within a week, the company will have his job posted online. Within a month, someone else will be sitting in his chair. ​But his family ,his children will still talk about him every day,they will ask where is daddy , His wife will mourn him for ages ,he was the love of her life . ​At work, we are just a "resource" that can be replaced in a week. At home, we are the world. Stop giving your best energy to a desk that will forget you, and giving the "leftovers" to the people who never will.

When you finally realised you could have been dead and forgotten if not for the mercy and grace of God through Christ Jesus.

there’s a level of sadness that actually makes you hyper sexual… and i am not even joking ..

Druski knows if he does that he’s gonna be Deadski

The embarrassment you feel after telling everyone you found a good woman, then she switches up and breaks your heart like it’s nothing.

if i have 13k photos with you we gone figure it out