ꜱ ʟ ∆ ᴘ ᴛ ᴏ ᴘ

If I ever wrote a tweet worth pinning, it would be here.

I’ve got two wallows tickets for Brixton Academy available. It’s sort of short notice I know as the gig is tonight.

@greennuneaton Hi Keith, can you let me know if you are or know of anyone who is planning any action against the proposed McDonalds on Weddington Road? It’s an awful development and I’d be happy to help ing any action.

How Musk broke Twitter and helped elect Trump (Location: Tesla European HQ, Amsterdam)

Yes! The candidate is looking for a job, not a spot in a Mr Beast video.

@supertanskiii What's a "bitch watch out"? Or has someone missed a vocative comma and full stop? (And an apostrophe).

That’s what the big men will say to him in prison

@supertanskiii I forgot how much I dislike this giant dick splash of a human being.

And so it begins.

@FergusCraig That's pretty cheap for a laptop though.

My take is that getting a series of celebrities to tell voters that GDP is up isn’t necessarily persuasive when an apple costs $7.

Tonight, we (@pinkchipsmusic) finished the arrangement of a new song. I have some idea of what the lyrics will be, but it'll no doubt take me another month to write them.

@mikeb26and352 Mike, that's sad news.💔 I hope you and your family are ok.

Oof. Rough day. This morning we said goodbye to our precious Lion.🐱 She was the last of the Big 3 who were seemingly always here with us as we raised our kids. Lion was such a cool cat and we were so lucky to have her in our lives.💔

James Dyson can fuck right off.

Remains one of my all time favourite interview snippets.

I’m not a puppet Elon.. I’m a daughter of two immigrant parents that had to work their ass off to provide for me! I’m a product of welfare, I’m a product of section 8, I’m a product of poverty and I’m a product of what happens when the system is set up against you….But you don’t know nothing about that. You don’t know not one thing about the American struggle…. PS fix my algorithm

About 50% of the likes I get on here now are for the same post and are always a different spambot advertising the same only fans page. Wasn't it this battery muncher's mission to get rid of bots on Twitter?

I used to engage in discourse on twitter. Now all I seem to do is block spambots and doom scroll @hourly_shitpost.

@oscarfogelstrm Never!

My neighbour is deep down the grey home aesthetic rabbit hole. Last week he was painting his fence panels grey and now his painting the grey concrete fence posts grey too. 🩶

@Dr_Keefer @EcoFlowTech And what fuel does she think a data centre or hospital backup system uses? Because it's diesel. It's always diesel.

All this while shilling home battery systems for @EcoFlowTech which can insulate the rich from the vagaries of her dystopian "smart grid" while exposing the poor to market forces that can correct their bad habits of turning on the aircon when its dangerously hot out.

I'm considering leaving twitter and going to a platform with better quality shit adverts.

After four years of working from home I've decided to invest in a laptop holder and from now on will no longer be balancing my laptop on two jigsaw boxes.