kettlex

@humbleblazer He should’ve told her the trunk is in the front of the car

Man's realizing his girl dumb as hell is a humbling experience. Now you gotta leave her.

@KILLTOPARTY Whatever it takes

@sumoktl Soon

Are modern women insane?

@KILLTOPARTY Theres plenty of girls who aren’t virgins and are also weird and/or religious. Thats not really the problem the problem is that older virgins probably have an aversion to physical touch caused by some underlying issue that would eventually affect other aspects of the relationship

Men want virgins and there isn’t anything wrong with that, but I don’t think these guys realize what they’re getting. A modern virgin is either going to be a) weird, b) very religious, or c) both (most likely). This is the real madonna-whore complex.

@KILLTOPARTY God forbid your wife wants to look hot for you

This guy knows exactly what a “mommy makeover” is

Fixed it for you BBC!

@KILLTOPARTY I would just kill my husband

Being married is stupid because your spouse can drop something like this on you and you can’t immediately walk

@KILLTOPARTY Her forehead is like her best feature

Birth control hairline is real

@KILLTOPARTY That’s so mean to not say hi back😭

Bad news, cowboy

I still play alone

I didn’t think I’d become like my childhood self

@KILLTOPARTY I plan to kms if my future husband dies first because I’ve always fantasized about being cremated and having my urn buried in his casket with his arms wrapped around me

Not only do I support age gap relationships, but I think men should be buried with their living wives like ancient pharaohs were buried with servants

@KILLTOPARTY Marrying someone you’re not obsessed with sounds miserable asf

What do you do? Shut up and marry him. Cash out of the market while you’re still ahead. Ten years from now, you’ll be begging God for a man half as decent—but you won’t listen.

I want to take care of someone

@KILLTOPARTY Unemployed and can’t even cook herself a meal Wtf is she doing

THE HERO WE NEED

@KILLTOPARTY My mom was a stay at home mom and all she did was nap

Can stay at home moms HANDLE ANY MORE STRESS????????

@emperorthesteve @KILLTOPARTY Found a retard ^^^^

@sumoktl @KILLTOPARTY Only retards don't know basic facts like where Washington DC is, who the FIRST PRESIDENT was, when the Civil War and WW2 happened. These are literally facts an 8 year old could tell you.

Lobster too buttery, wine too refined

@KILLTOPARTY How evil do you have to be to wait 8 years to tell your gf that you don’t want kids

Family planning is conceptually unnatural. Overthink anything and you end up not doing it. Children should be accidents.