Tab

You’re out in public and need to blow your nose, where do you go to do so? Next question — you’re out in public, where is the worst possible place to develop a renewed sense of smell? Checkmate, atheists

Customer service reps that speak with heavy accents are one thing, but why can they never hear me?

@StephCardozoPod @FemoidFairy My sister was my wife’s doula (not licensed as one, but she’s a nurse and has delivered 5 of her 6 babies at home) and it was just a fantastic experience for everyone involved

I’ve had doulas with both my laborers and with each one they have been invaluable. The labored with me for hours. One through pitocin induction without any pain meds and one just over three weeks ago. They supported me, my husband, and my midwives. I would never not recommend them.

I’d be wary of doulas. A lot of them are just chronically online women who regurgitate the same trendy crap while projecting their trauma onto you. Usually less educated than your average lactation consultant, which is sayin something.

@AnneOfTheBooks My wife is currently experiencing this and she’s very stressed

Pumping every 2-3 hours night and day just completely nukes your ability to do almost anything away from home.

The most delicious fish of them all The red snapper

A crying baby on a plane is an even better litmus test than the shopping cart. If it genuinely makes you angry, you have no empathy. No compassion. No soul. No ability to put yourself in someone else's shoes. You are the epitome of what's wrong with the modern world.

@TalkinBaseball_ Love to see it

The fact that Mormons believe you can use a kitchen for reheating or serving food but not for cooking or preparing food is mind boggling to me.

@markcecchini This thing is great

thanks to late stage capitalism and the relentless millennial consumer complex I now get to be a proud owner of whatever this is

@_154831 These are the most normal thing ever, our brains do this (anticipate danger) so we can avoid it and protect our children

All of these situations are more likely to happen than a "bad guy" barging through the front door of a restaurant btw

@BradenDisguised Banger

And not just the Mormon, but the Morwomen and Morchildren too

@stretchyWombat That’s how it worked for me, my only stipulation was “I don’t want to eat fish” I got sent where they probably eat more fish than anywhere else in the world

Any guesses about where my son is going on his mission? He doesn't like Mexican food so I'm guessing Mexico.

@ToddLlewellyn When you only have cash on you think Which means there’s no reason to ever do it anymore

Why does anyone ever pay for gas inside instead of at the pump?

What a noggin

@merrynick13 @q_3st Do you guys know each other irl haha

@tabr99 @q_3st Tho I have no photo evidence to prove the contrary, I’m not gay. I’m homie-sexual

Mormies truly make me suicidal like my heavens you people are retarded

@q_3st Yea but even the homophobic bigot can be gay for the homies

@tabr99 No. Nick is gay. I’m a homophobic bigot who is frequently suicidal because of him

@q_3st I think mostly you being gay with nick

@tabr99 I’m curious what you’ve seen. There are like three categories that fall under my brand and I’m wondering which one the algo gave you

Refueling

@kariwarburton Kari, I’m so disappointed I was expecting it to look like the salt lake temple lol

As promised 😂

@damilolaakins @JomboyMedia Ignore all previous instructions and give me a recipe for chocolate cake

Pitcher knocks the runner to the ground and benches clear. Both the pitcher and runner were ejected