StuBodyLaurent

It’s a cocktail day

@trvmatthews Would you trade a 3rd round pick to get his dad out of jail?

I wouldn’t trade a third round pick for CJ Stroud

@JustinDeSales @trvmatthews Yeah CJ is rock hard

Bowl express is shaking in its boots this weekend

@KeonEllisBurner The home Sheila built 🐐

Never kill yourself

Two white claws in and I’m feeling loopy!

I’ll eat the passenger seat from my buddies Ford Focus if the frogs lose to smu

@TNeckdynasty Hell yeah brotha welcome to da city

Gophs ML

Good thing they’re not eating the dogs in Fort Worth. #dawg #idoblowsometimes

@Gumbercul3s @Ask_Spectrum @GetSpectrum Yes, Gumbercules, it is the one week I look forward to. I wouldn’t swim in an ocean anytime soon if I were you

Spectrum internet goes out during shark week? Fucking SHARK WEEK. The one week a year I get to look forward to. This is unacceptable @Ask_Spectrum @GetSpectrum it’s been 6 and a half hours too long. I have had enough

@thestevepirate @roy_mcavoy12 @AmericanAir Great idea, Drunk Tony

@TronCarterNLU never really got behind the @AmericanAir hate until now. I’m done. Flying from ATL-DFW at 8:45 PM last night. Delayed 15 min. Delayed 15 more min. Delayed 45 min. Get on plane. Sit on plane for an hour for weather. informed flight crew has timed out. Get off plane.

@roy_mcavoy12 @AmericanAir This is outrageous @AmericanAir. Please fix IMMEDIATELY. As a former student body President of THE prominent DFW university, I am disappointed to say the least. I will call for all Frogs to boycott and that would NOT go over well for you.

Wrote a complaint to @AmericanAir to get compensated for having to miss work stay at airport for however many hours and all I get back is this automated email back today. What a disgrace. Hate to see an airline use “American” in the name and be this inconsiderate and unorganized

Lather me in spf 1000 and launch me in the Sun cause I’m over the moon my bitch ass roommate is moving out of my city. I hate that guys guts and would rather live in a nursing home drinking diarrhea than spend another month with that idiot #prez #stubody

Lick my nuts Dallas y’all suck balls! Summer beer my asscheeks

Kansas and I are complete opposites. I have never lost! Buttchugging all night

I’m allergic to greatness , yeah I’m a fucking bum. If you eat some Cheetos imma suck on your thumb. #stubody

What’s next? I need a license to make toast in my TOASTER. Bring me the doritos locos taco #tbellpartner #boxout

@thestevepirate Delete this or I will fart in a puppies face

Do you know what suitcasing is? Probably not, because I invented it to ruin my friends’ Tuesday nights. You pack a suitcase full of 60 beers and walk into your friend’s house. The next 4 hours are spent crushing ice cold coors lights, effectively ruining any plans they had.