Tim Leak

Today, I turn 30. Last night, I worked @13thGate haunted house, and it was good. I didn’t ask for the night off because that’s how I wanted to say goodbye to my 20’s, the way I lived them, dressed like a lunatic and making everyone in the room VERY uncomfortable

@joshaaronwatts Next on the playlist, a true classic, aged to perfection,

I’m sorry but sometimes the funniest part of an open micer’s set is the host giving them the light after a joke fails to land

I’m doing a thing you should see it’ll be fun

Got my Covid booster today, so if my arm looks swollen, it’s because I’m fucking jacked

Man, today is going well; I found a weird bug! Look at this guy!

Didn’t realize this was up for debate, but I’ll stand by it

@PearlRiverFlow @devindrome Stephens Fries?

@devindrome yeah but I needed someone identifiably british who's name was funny when pluralized in two wrong ways

oh no the Neils Gaimens don't like us, oh no they're gonna pout all broody on us

"Ain't no rule says a dog can't be King of England!” - Heir Bud

@DragonFoxStar I hope y’all feel better! Are y’all near Mandeville these days?

MANDEVILLE THIS IS HAPPENING

I’m trying to be a himbo, but I don’t know how

I just cut the sleeves off a t-shirt and it became my new favorite t-shirt. I’m not allowed to say ‘bro’ ironically anymore

Well it isn’t a multiverse of mental health, that’s for sure

Superpositioning is a physicist’s favorite sex move

Those weird ‘tricks to get rid of hiccups’ seem really good at keeping you occupied long enough for your hiccups to go away

Mashed potatoes are an underrated sandwich ingredient

I’ve been listening to a lot of Taylor Swift to try and understand the plight of the late-20’s white woman

I love impressions. Get some alcohol in me, I do a great impression of a drunk person