sjöbo-sebbe

@NickAdamsinUSA this tweet likely has a better script than the documentary

I am settling in for a showing of ‘Melania’ and the theater is PACKED! Earlier, a bystander asked if I was heading in to see Avatar, and I stopped dead in my tracks. “Avatar? No, son,” I curtly replied. “I don’t watch woke movies. I’m here to see the groundbreaking documentary about our incredibly talented First Lady.” The man’s two little girls began jumping up and down, pulling on his sleeve, and begging, “Daddy, we want to see Melania!” “But. But…” he stammered, “I thought you girls wanted to see Zootopia 2?” “No, no, NO,” they said, now nearly shouting. “We want to see Melania!! She is the most beautiful First Lady EVER.” Their father was scrambling, stressed out, and disoriented. “Girls, I’m afraid you aren’t the only ones who are captivated by President Trump and his beautiful wife,” I said, kneeling to get on their level. “Virtually everyone in this theater is here for the 7:30 PM showing, and it’s been sold out for days.” Tears began to well up in their eyes. “But…” I said in a hushed tone, “I happen to have a few extra tickets with me, and I’d like you and your dad to have them.” They jumped for joy and began hugging their father. He looked relieved as he wiped the sweat off his brow with a smile. I handed him the tickets and pulled him close. “Raise these girls right,” I whispered. “Teach them to be classy conservative women of faith like Melania, don’t let them become like Meghan Markle. Capisce?” He hugged me and thanked me profusely. “What are you going to do now?” He asked. “Don’t worry about me, son,” I told him, with a twinkle in my eye. “I’ve already got tickets to the next showing.”

@HoldenCox02 @TheOmniLiberal this is a joke right

Omg look at my best friend I ran into!

@counterconor the day has come when i agree more with conor than destiny huh, what a day

what the fuck is this day

@Tornantitan @kuldeepsaini_23 you're a real delight aren't you

@trattman @kuldeepsaini_23 Don't care.

THIS ANIMATION IS INSANE HOLY SMOKES 🔥

@Tornantitan @kuldeepsaini_23 never been more disappointed with a tweet in my entire life

@kuldeepsaini_23 Not an anime, it's a gacha game called Honkai Star Rail.

=D :| :o o_o

🏆🏆EMEA MASTERS WINTER CHAMPIONS🏆🏆 WE DID IT!!!! WPGG

@Timcast there's no way you're a real human 😂 first elon true bot prototype 100%

After we destroy the Canadian economy their will to resist will erode We will then march in unopposed and deliver Canada to its rightful place as a territory of the US with no political representation

The destiny leaks are so funny. Every conservative is losing their mind and posting "see look how pathetic he is" And all DGGers are like"haha yeah thats our little bisexual gooner gnome 🥰"

@elonmusk how does it feel to be the greatest source of misinformation in the country

Election streaming today! YouTube - youtube.com/watch?v=OFMUSo… Kick - kick.com/destiny YouTube Data/Election Map Stream - youtube.com/watch?v=Eoxi-g…

THE BEST ROSTER IN THE HISTORY OF LEAGUE OF LEGENDS UNREAL

@TheOmniLiberal it would be hilarious if you streamed it today ngl

wait wtf GTA RP is actually based?

@jstlk_ @Erobb221 @IRL_Darius least surprising drama of the year

Holy shit @Erobb221 just sucker punched @IRL_Darius LIVE at Twitch Con right after confirming that Darius DID NOT LIE about the erobb cheating allegations earlier this week!

This is the most relatable Destiny clip of all time

@elonmusk are you even a real human lol

I think the risk of this is very real

@Nigel1804151 @RationalMale @TheOmniLiberal prolly this dumbass imgur.com/a/rollo-lost-5…

@RationalMale @TheOmniLiberal Why do they think I am you? 😂

.@TheOmniLiberal is a LIAR. I NEVER Tweeted anything like what he’s claiming here. I have no Alts.

@elonmusk surely

The European Commission offered 𝕏 an illegal secret deal: if we quietly censored speech without telling anyone, they would not fine us. The other platforms accepted that deal. 𝕏 did not.

"Boogie I'm here to confront you on your cancer diagnosis"