vickelodeon

@mikawirth_ ITS NAME IS WILFRED AND IT HAS AN INSTAGRAM

and for the lady, perhaps a monday-thursday 10am-4pm work schedule?

You know the tweet’s a banger when it gets 0 likes but gets screenshot and sent in a group chat

You’ve never truly been humbled unless you’ve manually spread your ass cheeks for a woman to zap you with a laser down there

watching Indiana Jones for the first time, do archaeologists typically kill this many people?

it’s so funny that straight men don’t know how to take good pictures of themselves and the ones that do are evil

British ppl kinda ate when they came up with "don't even joke lad"

Everyone started wearing black and white, I want our colors back

My feet are killing me but my best friend from Norway visited me in NY for a week and we frolicked and ate a lot of good food had the best time 💕

it was a pleasure miscommunicating with you

Friends who insist on taking photos of you when they think you look good >>>>

someone said they were a ‘cloud architect’, for a moment i imagined the most incredible job in the world before i realized they mean like software

Never forget that YOU are a data center. Drink some water!!

Laying in bed, listening to the rain, watching cars drive over the Manhattan Bridge

@HasJobAndBennys Wow problemmaxxing

@vsaintlaurent I have many, yes.

mogmaxxing

@HasJobAndBennys Problem?

@vsaintlaurent Hey idk if the public is ready for this but ok

@420mercymain69 some of you have never had your nuts dragged around by a claw hammer and it shows

Pronouncing oatmeal like Montreal