Nate Walsh

Oh no my invaluable personal brand on twitter 💸 Wait come back

@duolingo I WAS MADE CERTAIN PROMISES

@CougThoughts @4sqSupport @SwarmApp I'm having the same problem – can I please have my account reinstated, or at least an explanation of what I did wrong? I've been using the app for over a decade, 30k+ check-ins, tracking my life and mental health and inside jokes; this is honestly kind of devastating to me

@4sqSupport @SwarmApp Every time I try to make an edit on either the Swarm or Foursquare apps I keep getting this error when I try to save

lol @ this extremely human birthday post from my company's HR site

noooo you guys not Threads everyone just come back to Foursquare I mean Swarm swarmapp.com

they renamed my laptop, so now when my headphones disconnect, they say "Nate Walsh: lost" like, that's just one man's opinion, man

"in many ways, I'm actually straighter than y'all"

I was hanging w/ these nice bros at the Cosmo lobby bar, and I said I was low-key offended that the bar's many varied escorts never saw me as a mark, and they went, "oh, we just assumed you were super gay" no god damn it I like women SO much I want to DRESS LIKE THEM OBVIOUSLY

listen all of you need to reinstall Foursquare and respond to my friend requests this is how I anchor myself to reality, all right

k I live in Oakland again now now what

OK but did anyone consider that Pitbull might have been a secret genius this entire time??

@donotine I honestly still can't tell but I will say Rob Thomas gets that "Bright Lights" should be the closing number which means he gets the point of Matchbox 20 which you'd hope would be the case but still

@whateverdude aaaaand?

tonight we try to determine once and for all whether I Matchbox 20 earnestly or ironically

@LoadShoota I kind of learned my lesson the one time

well here we go into Séance Tiktok see you never

holy hell I cannot BELIEVE I almost forgot the absolute best part about living here I now get to play Sheryl Crow's "Leaving Las Vegas" as much as I want for the next, like, goddamn MONTH I made a PowerPoint slide about this shit 7 YEARS AGO twitter.com/whateverdude/s…

is it worth $12/month forever for my own imdb page? featuring my role as Enthusiastic Concert Attendee (uncredited) in 2006 rom-com flop /The Break-Up/ I'd need headshots. . . .

umm how did I not know Elli and I were featured on Popsugar's best HP cosplay of LeakyCon 2016? lolololll talk about a Hogwarts Legacy #photo-42598019" target="_blank" rel="nofollow noopener">popsugar.com/tech/Best-Leak…

for what it's worth, I never Notify Anyway

"hello WebMD? I'd like to suggest a symptom for your mania page?" 😖

~ eyes gently flutter open ~ yawn! perhaps today will be a good day actually ~ "Daughters" by John Mayer starts playing in head ~ oh I see