witch hands

Rest assured that no matter what colour medal Brady Tkachuk earns today, he'll spend the first 30 minutes after he receives it trying to unwrap the chocolate inside

this is why i moved to new york city. for my art.

white people be like i have to pick up my dog’s Invisilign

My Spanish is really coming along. Understood this caption perfectly.

Honored to be included but shocked at the choice

BUUUUUT DE GUENTZEL EN FILET DÉSERT POUR POTENTIELLEMENT DONNER LA VICTOIRE AUX ÉTATS-UNIS USA 3-1 Canada #4Nations

Matt Rempe 0.0000001 seconds after being called back up to the NHL:

Not to be dramatic but when I accidentally save a file twice and it adds that (1) at the end, it is the worst moment of my life

when i’m watching the batman and he starts being mean to alfred

That friend thats always at 1 hp

jigsaw: in front of you are two bell peppers. one cures you from the poison running through your body and one turns you into a gorilla. choose wisel- me:

a mouse leaving his house: phone… wallet…. cheese….

Opened the fridge, saw what I thought to be a delicious elixir. When I tell you I almost called 911 after taking a gulp of this

@mommybloggerss sounds like people just dont trust you to keep their handshakes a secret so no one tells you about them

people dont have secret handshakes anymore.

Take a look at who'll be rockin' the red for the first time this season at @CapitalOneArena tomorrow! #CapsSabres | #ALLCAPS

@mommybloggerss no girl ur literally so beautiful 😍✨just give the people what they want and post it already!!

i also got arrested but im too shy to post my mugshot

When I’m being given my day and my daily bread: 😍🤩🤑 When I’m being forgiven, my trespasses : 🤪🥳🥰 When it comes time to forgive those who trespass against me: 😷😒🤮

david attenborough: [mumbling] skip. i dont like this animal. skip it.

we live in a world of incredible innovation but why are car bluetooth speakers still so hard to connect to