Oatmeal

@vxunderground am offend

To avoid confusion, I'm not positioning myself as like, the authority figure on who is an expert and who isn't an expert in cybersecurity. My point is that cybersecurity tends to be very close and tight-knit and you would expect someone world-renowned to be immediately identifiable by someone else who works in the industry. My post is meant to be funny and criticize TV people

I am genuinely impressed by mainstream media outlets ability to find absolute nobodies in cybersecurity. It's remarkable. I am often left speechless. There has been dozens occasions, especially as of recent, where some media outlet will be like, "Today as a special guest is world-renowned cybersecurity expert and ethical hacker Joe McCyberSecurity". I'm like, who the fuck is Joe McCybersecurity? I've been doing cybersecurity and malware stuff for a long time and I've never once seen or heard of Joe McCybersecurity. If he is world-renowned, I would THINK I would have seen them or heard of them. The camera then pans over to Joe McCybersecurity and it is the most generic cookie cutter white dude in a cheap suit and the tag below him will say something like, "Joe McCybersecurity, Ethical Hacker, CEO of Cybersecurity McJoe Industries" I'm like, "Cybersecurity McJoe Industries? What the fuck is that?". I look it up and it's a generic WordPress website hosted on GoDaddy with an expired SSL cert. Joe McCybersecurity then babbles incomprehensible nonsense for about 60 seconds until the TV host goes "woaw" and it cuts to a commercial. Absolute cinema.

@GamewithDave Death Stranding

What game is this?

@DHSgov You know the funny thing about that is Republicans control all three branches.

Thank a Democrat.

@endingwithali @shalkie but you’ve been hot all along ✨

@shalkie confirming that no matter how much work i put in i will never be hot :(

Why does it look like @endingwithali in this trailer?

@straceX Coding in Python 🐍

13 years old kid and already coding in Python. What were you doing at his age?

@vZeroG @kaorrosi @Network232 It’s literally twitter

@hackeroats @kaorrosi @Network232 Your lack of grammar makes it hard to take you seriously but thank you for the feedback.

Why does Broadcom do their darndest to hide VMware workstation on their website? Like why do you have to complete a treasure hunt just to download it?

@vZeroG @kaorrosi @Network232 you come across as a prick. just fyi

It’s early, so I’ll play along for one more. And yeah, I know you’re just trying to get a jab in here but WTH. I’m pretty fun at parties, as I tend to intentionally hang around active, healthy, intelligent, successful people to keep me motivated. That said, I generally prefer spending time with my wife and family these days. There’s not too many deeply technical nerds out there that also have the social skills to back them up. I enjoy being part of both worlds, longer and looking younger than most. 🙂

@vZeroG @kaorrosi @Network232 I bet you’re great at parties. Jfc

@kaorrosi @Network232 I'll allow the recovery to save face this time, but next time make a funny joke. Believe me - I'm plenty relaxed.

MICROSLOP FUCKS UP THE INTERNET BY FORCING VIBE CODED SHITFUCKS INTO PRODUCTION. PRODUCT CONSISTENTLY BREAKS. NO ONE IS SURPRISED MICROSOFT COPILOT FOR CODE FOR COGITHUB FOR MICROSLOP 356 COPILOT FOR MICOSLOP COCOMPUTERS WITH 100% UNMITIGATED KERNEL CO ACCESS AND NO COSECURITY CHECKS

@LowLevelTweets Canon parenting event lol

my son just now “I’m little and you are big” Yep good job buddy “I have a little tummy and you have a BIG tummy” 😑

@0xTib3rius They said romance is dead

Writing an AI-assisted subdomain enumerator and calling it "subdomAIn-enum" while giggling.

@tryhackme @Who_Ami77 🥱

@Who_Ami77 You should check out TryHackMe's Pentester Path and cert!

Matter of Time ⏳

@BigJonnyQuest @NoahKingJr It’s always the same “the two endpoints are the weak link in e2ee” Like, yeah. You have to be able to trust the person you’re communicating with.

@NoahKingJr Who said signal can’t be trusted? And why? Be specific.

@DHSgov judge signature where

THIS IS FALSE. Here’s the warrant. It’s embarrassing when sanctuary politicians fall for these obvious hoaxes peddled by the media. We look forward to you correcting the record. Next time ask us and we will get you the facts.

@kmcnam1 but we have a poorly documented api 👉👈

ROFL. Ok, Microsoft...

@Thebiglade VTI and chill.

You’re given $2m. You have 20 minutes to spend it. You can’t spend it on cars, airplanes, yacht or a house. You can’t spend it on golds or diamonds either. What will you buy??

@Ravenismeee Cookbooks, mostly.

Men who can cook .. who taught you??

@verticalcheddar @saradietschy Who hurt you

@saradietschy This doesn’t exist. People who say this just want to seem interesting. Same for people who claim they can see music and hear colors. Go learn a skill and impress us with something that takes effort.

Okay this is blowing my mind My husband doesn’t have an internal dialogue so he says he has to talk out loud to clarify his thoughts???? Is this normal for you weirdos that can’t hear your voice inside your head???

@ddankenst @TonyLaRocco @saradietschy Same.

@TonyLaRocco @saradietschy i have aphantasia but my inner monologue won't shut up i just can't visualize images

@saradietschy Congrats on being one of the 10,000!