Queen Crab

Sorry, I’m not free this weekend. On Friday night, I’m busy recovering from the 5 day work week. Saturday is only 45 minutes long, and on Sunday, I’m totally tied up with a series of panic attacks because Monday is literally 30 minutes away.

u were draining & broke as fuck i do not miss u

i love saying fuck me because it can either be sexual or self loathing and those are two things that describe me perfectly

everyday is earth day if u love nature enough

The way everyone checks out of work on Fridays is a clear sign we need a four days workweek.

the most hilarious thing about this is that MOST female smut readers are fantasising about a world where men are good at sex and confident in pleasuring women. MOST male porn watchers are fantasising about a world where women are just vessels for degradation and torture

It’s just me and my mental illness against the me

explosion at the health potion factory, 0 dead, 0 injured

Men’s idea of kinky is just choking women and having threesomes.

if u think a man is lying he is goodnight

men judging women for reading smut while being absolute p@r.n addicts themselves will never sit right with me

Jonathan Frakes 'Beyond Belief' clips played at half speed make him sound like a drunk dude at the bar

nobody is just going to be a good little worker for the economy if they don’t believe in the dream anymore. you put the carrot too far away

I agree with this actually

I’m trying to accessorize more

can i come over and just do this

best types of beer (no order) - patio - first of the night - with a lime - at your favorite dive bar - with wings - on the dance floor

You laugh, but both of my Twitter crushes liked this picture 😌

@scorpia_nb Absolutely heartbreaking. I rewatched maybe 10 years ago and I didn’t remember anything until it happened and it was like… it was awful

@__karby Let's just be glad it isn't Ace Ventura 😵‍💫🤣

Watched the episode of bones where the victim is a trans woman and aside from Booth makin a few “I’m catholic god doesn’t make mistakes” comments, it was actually pretty chill and normal, and it came out 20 years ago!