Simon Shaw

@valerecofficial Do we know how old the skipper was when debutant was born?! 👴

Here’s how we line up for tonights Priaulx game against Sylvans. Penney, Skillen, Kelly and a senior football debut for Alfie Torode. They replace Martin, Rowe, Graham and Le Poidevin. #ValeRecFC 🟡🟢 #PridePassionBelief

@UnitedGoals__ Yes uncle

GOAL!! Casemiro vs Newcastle (1-1) x.com/Trend591521/st…

@FalconryFinance Nice carbon monoxide exposure for the pregnant woman. Chavvy as f

gender reveal kills ten

@GuernseyFuelOil Tempted fate here! 🤣

It's worth looking back at the fuel table from June ‘22 Fuel was 10p dearer then & that's with a 14.2p increase in fuel duty So price is 24.2ppl cheaper now than in June ‘22 Oil price at the time was $118.95 per barrel v $71.21 today For all those that say price never goes down

Sesko for Amad at half time please @ManUtd

Remember the name

What a moment for Tom Edozie, scoring a late equaliser against Arsenal on his debut. His dad Fandab must be buzzing.

@ManUtd New social media admin tomorrow? #chopped

Manchester United prides itself on being an inclusive and welcoming club. We will continue to represent our people, our city and our fans with purpose and pride.

@SkySportsNews How can you do ‘too well’ 😂

"United have got a problem where Michael Carrick is doing too well" 👀 Will Manchester United turn to Michael Carrick in the summer outside of other candidates? 🤔

@richardajkeys So anti United it’s embarrassing

That’s harsh.

@MufcWonItAll2 So powerful, thanks for sharing

Sir Matt Busby from his hospital bed in Munich speaks Old Trafford over the tannoy.

@footballontnt Sceptical Amorim had any say in these signings. He was ‘head coach’ remember

Ruben Amorim's only summer transfer window at Man United ✍️

@Footballtweet I suspect a Brazilian side piece…

This is John Sims, a die-hard season ticket holder of Birmingham City and Santos FC. 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 🇧🇷 The man travels every single week from England to Brazil to watch Birmingham and Santos every week. A few days ago he made a 41-hour trip just to see Santos lose 4-2 to Chapecoense. Tremendous. 🔝

@fesshole The sort of person who would also take their own twelve inch plate

I work away with work and often stay in hotels. I make sure to book hotels with breakfast added to the bill. I then edit the invoice to remove breakfast, and create a new invoice for breakfast. Double pay for food allowance.

@FabrizioRomano Wolves pulled Palace’s pants down there

🚨❤️💙 Crystal Palace agree deal to sign Jørgen Strand Larsen from Wolves, here we go! Transfer fee will be £45m plus £5m add-ons. Story revealed this morning on bid improved now confirmed, all agreed club to club. Jorge Mendes negotiated the deal, now agreed in principle.

No idea what Amorim was thinking not playing Kobbie

Uncle Cass 😢

@Malachians Deluded and stubborn. You get your best players on the pitch

Watching how Mainoo and Fernandes played at the weekend has me wondering what it was about Amorim’s system that meant they couldn’t play together and what justified that decision?

@utdscope Don’t think you drop Dorgu after Saturday and Cunha impact from the bench if required. Otherwise spot on imo

I wouldn’t be opposed to this on Sunday. I would like to see Sesko start but it’s hard to decipher who to drop him for in this team.

AFCON final absolutely wild!