ʚɞ nat

I want to make a new pinned and change my user so this is the load bearing post 20, they/she married lesbo user used to be 400kcalz active on edtwt since 2021 (different accs) I like what i like and I have nothing to prove, im rotting away basically edtwt , shedtwt

the ocd ed comorbidity is LETHAL and i fear I am COOKED

@prodviky its terrifying and still upsets me seeing the bigger final number, but my mental hunger has been literally 0 so thats worth it for me ❤️‍🔥

@decomposedheart literally☹️ i wanna try harm reduction and eating at least 1400 while walking 20k+ but any spike in the scale- even if its technically just water weight- is genuinely so hard to cope w/ im srsly so tired. did you jump straight to it bae or gradually increase ? i feel so lost

I hate trying to maintain i feel so fake and disgusting

@prodviky same 🫠🫠 I slowly increased by 100c a month since January and ive been having consistently over 1280 for 2 months now, and I didnt have a scale for the first 4 months but I lost 6 lbs during the process 🫣 now I maintain/lose between bmi 12 - 13.1 depending on water weight!!

@debbiesarah30 this is what I do, I eat 1300 cal - 1600 cal and walk like 14k-20k a day, im also 172cm (38kgs) 🫂🫂🖤 I would 100% recommend just jumping into it and drinking sm water especially at first!!

I wanted to be pretty but instead I destroyed myself and any chance I had at a somewhat okay life and now i just live in constant hell

im doing so bad i dont reply to anyone not my parents not my coworkers not anyone I have 0 energy to do anything but go to work and absolutely anything outside of that (other than wife obv) I literally can not even text back and I feel awful so fucking bad abt it

just had the most magical peach and apple yogurt bowl

i wish that I was as invisible as everyone make me feel

coworker will not stop bodychecking me every time im around her and she makes it so obvious my wife even noticed, I hate being alive cause wtf

weighing myself when i’m constipated knowing my real weight is lower but i can’t access that information

Being an exercise addict is all fun and games until you get sick and suddenly everything is horrible for a couple of days and you can't even cope the way you normally would

bodychecks from yesterday

I am in so much pain I need her to come home

you dont need to eat just wait longer

I love living in the times of end stage capitalism with the “your body will be punished for exerting yourself” disease.

I need to walk more im only ate 11k steps today but i feel so sick I cwnt move

I feel disgusted with myself when i exhibit symptoms of the disorders that i have like what do you mean im actually disabled 😄 no im just lazy and evil and I take advantage of everyone and im awful

when I’m abused and put through traumatic situations every single day and then everyone wonders why I act the way I do like guess what

the rate at which my ocd compulsions cause me to downward spiral needs to be studied

yog bowl 15 minutes