Corey Flynn

man, it's just letting you play with the controller unplugged

@maddiemeters boomers love talk to text

i tell my landlady that the smoke detector died and this is what she texts me back

@kariliv @olgakhazan

@olgakhazan I did it anyway. I didn't smoke or drink or use heavy blankets. She's 27 now, so I assume she's fine.

They tell you like 3 million times while you're pregnant + right after you've given birth not to co-sleep

@no2hater @olgakhazan they also tell you to do that 3 million times. baby sleeps in your room, not your bed.

@olgakhazan Okay but you know you can literally just put a crib in your bedroom right?

@noinconsistency this is exactly what y2k was about

this is from the Date constructor in javascript. who the fuck designed this

@shortyguy772820 @hallofgoodpod good one little guy

@CoreyNever @hallofgoodpod I imagine a lot of guys have been in your mom’s pants.

Felix Hernandez is NOT Hall of Pretty Good eligible

@shortyguy772820 @hallofgoodpod I imagine a lot of jokes go over shortyguy71's head

@hallofgoodpod He’s HOF eligible. What the fuck are you on?

@envidreamz she was probably bracing to have yet another "vaccines are not actually the devil" talks to some roganist.

The nurse practitioner flipped through my health history with practiced boredom as I sat in the OBGYN exam room this morning. Then she paused. “Plavix,” she said, her voice flat. “Why are you on that?” I told her the truth. “I had a heart procedure in February. They said I have to stay on blood thinners for 6 months.” She looked up. Really looked. A woman my age, healthy enough on paper, sitting vulnerable in the stirrups of routine care. Her eyebrows lifted slowly. “What happened to your heart?” I started the story the way I always do. “Since 2020, when I was both pregnant and had Covid, it worsened a congenital PFO and inflamed my heart and then…” She cut me off mid sentence, leaning forward, eyes bright and hungry. “Was this after you took the Covid vaccine?” I sat there stunned, watching her morph into something I had seen too many times now. No curiosity nor concern for my wellbeing. Her expression turned colder, almost mechanical. Rehearsed. As if the words were not her own but lines uploaded from an external source, into a synchronized command that had overwritten her natural thoughts. Her eyes gleamed with a programmed certainty that made my stomach turn. I reminded her, voice shaking with anger, that in 2020 there was no vaccine yet. None. I had been pregnant and fighting Covid when the world was still burning without a shot in sight. She blinked once. Her eyes reset to that flat, professional dullness, and she moved on to the next question as if I had never spoken. As if my heart damage had vanished the moment the word “vaccine” left her lips. That was when the real horror settled in. This lie lives and breathes among us all, waiting in every waiting room, hiding behind every clipboard, and wearing every white coat in every specialty. It is not just the internet or late night comment sections where strangers swear the virus was harmless and the shot was the monster. They have all swallowed the same story. The widespread devastation we see now, none of it belongs to the virus that tore through us in 2020. All of it belongs to the needle. The narrative is so complete, airtight, and so perfectly woven that even the people sworn to follow evidence have rewritten history inside their own minds. They look at me, a living witness to what Covid did to a pregnant body, and their eyes glaze over with the same hollow certainty: Covid is innocent. The shot is guilty. I left the clinic this morning with my prescription in hand and a chill that has not left my bones. The scariest part is not the damage inside my chest. It is the damage inside theirs. The certainty that the truth died in 2020 and something else replaced it. Something that smiles across the exam table, asks the same loaded question, and erases you the moment you speak the wrong answer. We are not just patients anymore. We are apparitions drifting through a medical system that has decided our suffering belongs to a different monster entirely. And every time another doctor looks at me with those wide, certain eyes, I realize the horror is not over. It is only just beginning.

@Wake_upWA because recreation is incidental on forestry land, but not in parks.

"DNR said its recreation budget is made up of several funding sources, including 8% of Discover Pass sales" Where does the other 92% of Discover Pass revenue go if not to keep parks accessible? The Discover Pass website promises "unlimited access to over 100 parks". Seems like a class action lawsuit might be in order! Why would I ever purchase a Discover Pass again?

unfortunately, I remember when 500 MB hard disks were pretty much the norm.

@Tomt41894251 @girth_ricky @DrewNextD00R @DJpowers69 @washghost1 yeah, but this diy lady probably put them up, so they were 4x8 from Lowe's

@girth_ricky @DrewNextD00R @DJpowers69 @washghost1 Do they strap the ceilings where you are? They won't lay the boards like that in Aus because it would be a pain to screw the long length on half a joist also use the cut at other end. Most of the ceiling sheets are 16ft here and you can order 20's if you have good spans.

Ma’am that is a load bearing wall

@greg_carker @DrewNextD00R @DJpowers69 @washghost1 drywall panels are taped on flat and butt joints. while it would be nice to buy a 4x {whatever size room I have} panel, it doesn't exist and you still need to put seams along and across framing members.

@DrewNextD00R @DJpowers69 @washghost1 I’m sure those mud patches on the ceiling are just there for decoration right? Idiot

@turnkey_copper @BlackWorkCat @otto_morgen that is the Tacoma Narrows bridge and it's not an earthquake. it's blowing in the wind. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tacoma_Na…

@BlackWorkCat @otto_morgen Word?

アメリカさんの事を家の手入れや知識が広く一般に普及していて、みんながDIYで家の価値を高めてさらに高値で売却をしていく文化は凄く良いなって思ってたけど、専門家の工事費が高いから知識とか構造とか関係なく自分の好きなようにぶっ壊して表面だけ整えた爆弾を取引してるだけって最近分かった。

@KriisW79 @AndrewHilaryUS I'm not. but that wasn't what the war was about. the South seceded and attacked Fort Sumter, years before slaves were emancipated. the whole war existed to preserve slavery, with the Confederacy fearing that a law would change (the peaceful way that most countries did it).

@CoreyNever @AndrewHilaryUS And the other side - America - fought for the end of slavery. You seem to be forgetting that part.

This is fucking insane. The civil war wasn’t to end slavery, it was to KEEP slavery.

@KriisW79 @AndrewHilaryUS a president was elected, the South got all hissy about it, seceded and started attacking the North. slavery hadn't even been abolished yet, they just loved their slaves so much that they needed to fight for the right to keep them.

@CoreyNever @AndrewHilaryUS So you agree 2 sides to a war? You try to minimize the complicated nature of it but you do agree that there were two sides? One "for slavery" and one "against slavery" (for argument sake, minimizing what actually happened) So you agree that America fought to end slavery and won?

@KriisW79 @AndrewHilaryUS the other side was attacked, fool

@AndrewHilaryUS lol hey you dipshit: There was 2 sides. One side was to "Keep slavery" (amoung many other things)? Guess what? The *OTHER SIDE* was to end it. And the "other side" won. You got your education from the "Learing Centers" didn't you?

@BigLawlbowski @AndrewHilaryUS and that free labor was predominantly which race?

@AndrewHilaryUS Technically correct, the southern army started the war in 1861. They started the war by firing upon Fort Sumter. This was due to the southern colonies wanting to keep slavery. Now, this was not due to a race thing directly but a economical reason. This was the driving labor then.

@Mariners Josh Naylor was at full speed too

Randy Arozarena: Elite base runner

@Vonagandr @DocPriyamMD no, you're just 21. give it time.

@DocPriyamMD My doc didn't believe me I drink a fifth a day, ran all the tests, passed with flying fucking carpets. I just don't consume refined sugar in addition with the sauce.

Patient: Doctor, I have no idea why my eyes are yellow and my stomach is swelling. I have always lived a clean life. Me: Do you drink alcohol? Patient: Alcohol? Never, doctor. I don't even touch the bottle. Me: Okay, let’s run some tests. Maybe it’s autoimmune or a rare metabolic issue. Lab results: AST:ALT ratio > 2:1, GGT through the roof, Ultrasound shows a shrunken, nodular liver (Cirrhosis). Me: These results look very consistent with heavy drinking. Are you sure you don’t drink? Patient: Well, I mean, I used to drink... but that was a long time ago. Like, ages ago. Me: How long is "ages ago"? Patient: Maybe a few years. It was just social. Me: Your blood work suggests something more recent. When was the actual last time? Patient: Oh, that? That was 3 days ago. But it was just a small quarter because I had a headache. Me: 👇

@pineapple_clock @AnthonyCastrio what the fuck

@AnthonyCastrio storing them as floats is the best because you can use the decimal point to separate the ZIP+4 code

ZIP codes are strings not numbers FYI