Made a couple guy friends at a con once who hit on me. I told them I wasn’t interested but it came up that I tutored Japanese so they signed up. On the second lesson one guy’s family was conveniently nearby, & he introduced me to his parents… I didn’t find out until later

he was telling his friend the whole time that he was taking lessons because he was hoping to date me

So he trapped me into being introduced to his parents on purpose, only the third time we had ever met, during (I thought) a professional lesson he was paying me actual money for, after I had firmly but kindly turned him down

There was no room for miscommunication. My mistake? Being kind to him when I communicated that I wasn’t interested. Apparently, that was all that was needed.

There’s something really gross about being used in a professional setting, having someone buy your services, and trapping you in that position under false pretenses

The feeling of being lied to and not being taken seriously at your job because a guy is attracted to you, is a seriously dehumanizing experience

@charliesubby It’s not dehumanising. It’s annoying. What situation would this happen where humans aren’t involved? What object was he treating you like? Woman always say men don’t see you as people, but can you not understand the human emotion of intense desire?

@charliesubby As a man, I cannot imagine being mad at an ugly annoying woman paying me for lessons, attempting to introduce me to her family because they like me. Annoying, pathetic.. yes. But I wouldn’t feel ‘dehumanised’ just because someone I didn’t like desperately wanted to be with me

@HarleyThomas202 @charliesubby your experience is not universal. you may have your own reservations about such a situation, but the great thing about being a human being is that you're allowed to feel differently about something than another. maybe stop feeling things in place of who experienced it first hand.

@HarleyThomas202 @charliesubby honestly? i can't explain it any other way,if you can't understand something as simple as boundaries, i'm afraid it's too late for you. you're a fucking loser, check yourself holy shit.

@datachapel @HarleyThomas202 @charliesubby besides empathy, i think the diff this guy misses is that there is a power dynamic between customer and teacher that is insidious to use for romantic purposes.