randomdadcomments

Sound advice to give to your daughters. “Don’t be the practice girl.” Don’t let them fool you, they know what that means and who it is.

@theliamnissan @lipjamjill This should confirm that “Grok” has taken over his account. And I’m thinking only one man can authorize that action.

@lipjamjill It's me Jill. Remember when you said you could connect me with entertainment industry people but then you didn't?

Liam doesn’t talk like this. If you’re friends with him in real life, check on him.

@JustRadEnough Ha! Had to explain that to my wife and why it wasn’t a good idea to have the kids wake me up.

Just a reminder that a man’s morning wood is a biological response and not because of you. Happy Friday!

@RepPeteStauber @POTUS @VP When is that election fraud coming out showing you never won the district?

Thank you @POTUS and @VP for tackling the rampant fraud that’s occurring in Minnesota and other blue states! Minnesotans want accountability now!

Why is there a penis in my drink???

@HeidiBriones @TheRabbitHole @LockwoodsLkgGls Well, not all.

@TheRabbitHole @LockwoodsLkgGls Everyone is bisexual in college and they're all straight by graduation.

The youngest generation is 10x more LGBTQ+ relative to the oldest generation with nearly a quarter (23%) identifying as LGBTQ+ compared to 2.3% in the oldest age group.

@AntiFraudClub @NatashaCL7 @nickshirleyy I don’t know…this seems fraudulent.

This is @nickshirleyy my X has been hacked and I’ve been locked out. Working to get it back ASAP. If anything is posted or messaged from there it is not from me.

@ThatEricAlper Richard Marx a few years back. Played a song with his kids using a pre-recorded video and did a song mid-stage without any mics or amps. One of the most surprising and amazing shows I have ever seen.

What concert left you feeling like a completely different person on the way out? Not necessarily the biggest show, just the one that meant the most.

@pinkmagiclala It’s fucking dumb.

Another 8 inches of snow coming this weekend. Guys... I'm tired.

@MichaelH_MN So, how far into the future are amendments good for? Do we still need it? Are expecting another slave wave?

If you think the authors of the 14th Amendment intended to incentivize anchor babies, you’re an idiot. It was written to secure the civil rights of former slaves. It is being exploited and Americans are being taken advantage of.

Reporter: "The ICE agent k*lled her recklessly and unjustifiably!" Leavitt: "You're a left-wing HACK, you're not a REPORTER!" "You shouldn't even be sitting in that SEAT! You're pretending like you're a journalist..."

@rudysarzo Good job! You could barely see out of that window before.

After years of contemplating I finally went ahead and did it.

@GrageDustin Do your family or friends ever tell you that they heard that story before from you? Seems like someone needs to as you repeat the same things all the time. Or maybe a head injury?

Steal millions from taxpayers. Six months to a year in prison. Serve a cup of coffee during COVID. Three months in prison. Welcome to Tim Walz’s Minnesota.

Now that Artemis II has launched we have 10 days to get everyone on Earth a Planet of the Apes costume so we can do something hilarious when the astronauts return 😁

@TheCinesthetic First saw @jackblack on Mr. Show with @mrbobodenkirk and @davidcrosss. Great skit about milk and a farm.

High Fidelity was released 26 years ago. The film introduced Jack Black to mainstream audiences. His performance was so standout that it helped launch his career as a leading comedy star almost overnight.

@mnhousegop Both Time and National Geographic!

Democrats want to ban standard magazines commonly owned by Minnesota families for self-defense. But won’t support our proposals for non-public school security, nurses, or student mental health.

@Whatevah_Amy @FiceBrent The conversation may have went further had he just said he called to sell you Lady Pepperell sheets from Fingerhut.

If HE likes the way I look 🤣 @FiceBrent

Just announced! Sequel to Project Hail Mary. ‘Project Nail Gary’ starring Gary Busey as a carpenter on Saturn. Summer 2085.

@GuntherEagleman And after Elon bought Twitter he ever found those millions and retuned it? Classic DOGE.

🚨 JUST IN: Court documents reveal the FBI paid Twitter millions to censor the Hunter Biden laptop story before the 2020 election. They knew it was real but pushed the hoax anyway. This is straight-up election interference by the DEEP STATE.

@danicamckellar @joshsaviano Been a lot cooler if he was.

Happy 50th BIRTHDAY to my Wonder Years co-star @joshsaviano! My, how far we've come... We met as pre-teens and now we're in our 50's! 😋 . . Yes, Josh played the best friend Paul Pfeiffer, and no, he is not also Marilyn Manson. (Anybody else remember that rumor??) 😁 . . Grateful to have stayed in touch throughout the years. Here's to the next 50, my friend!!

@RepNancyMace Right, who wants to do a Clintonesque BJ trial again. Not me.

The media wants to talk about Bryon and Kristi Noem's personal drama and indiscretions. I want to talk about who is getting deported, who got paid, and who's stealing from taxpayers. Different priorities. Let's focus on what matters.