Jon FitzSimon

Here’s a reminder that you’re currently living in your “Good ‘ol days”. Be present where you are today.

@SullyBusiness How ™️ Many™️ Trademarks™️ Can™️ We™️ Fit™️ ?

Let my kid watch paw patrol damnit. I don’t want your credit card.

@chompchomp15 Nice! Howd you score tickets? I’ve tried the lottery for over a decade and haven’t gotten it yet. 🙃

This year my son gets a return visit, 2019 Monday practice round being his first. He was 9 and I’m not sure how much he remembers, but in the last three months he’s fallen back in love w the game and well…he’s fired up. 👊🏼 #themasters

Just toured an apartment and it looks like I won’t have to co-sign. They said as long as income is 2.5x rent, no co-sign needed.

@CPATaxTeam They’re like a German Sausage. The wurst

Client's hate portals they only use once per year.

The Bananas aren’t coming to San Antonio, but the fam will enjoy the Texas Tailgaters vs Loco Beach Coconuts. 🥳

The best way to tell how good (or bad) a company is? Visit their restroom. Good companies do the little things right.

@TheRock @Disney Tell me you sing You’re Welcome song. 🙏🏼

The ocean chose her for a reason 🌊 Experience @Disney’s MOANA only in theaters JULY 10. ~ 🪝

@nickgraynews 🫡

be me wake up 5am can't sleep walk to get coffee streets empty very peaceful quiet on the walk smell something nice a familiar smell on Barton Springs Rd "reminds me of India! little street fires" a comforting smell wait street fire in Texas bad walk faster find source of smell a little run now I can see flames, take out phone call 911 track to behind abandoned building entire backyard on fire tell 911 "um yes come fast pls" fire creeping onto building first truck appears I direct them to scene surprisingly they do not ask me to help citizen reporter Nick Gray no thanks needed just doing my duty

Writing in a Bible: is it ok to do?

@ClintFiore I was hoping you’d comment. 🫡

@jonfitzsimon my daughter just posted this pic to social media and I'm hecka proud of her

This is why business is awesome. 🤘🏼

So you’re telling me there’s a chance.

@Toms_Vibe What’s next?

@jonfitzsimon TV is over, internet/social looks like it's going to follow.

My two teenage sons (19 and 16) watch almost zero television. Social media and YouTube videos 99% of the time. Not even Netflix. Is television cooked after Gen Z?

@Challenger_ST @dhtoomey @grok How many high school aged track athletes have ran 10.04 100m dash or better in the last two years?

This speed at this age legitimately could be a top 10 most impressive thing ever achieved in human athletics

“If your $500k engineer isn’t consuming at least 15 diet cokes a day, something is wrong.” Sincerely, - CEO of Coca-Cola

@Friscokid49 Me tonight

Mrs Wineaux:

@FactsAboutTexas Love a good chalupa. Tex Mex is the best Mex.

Spicy take: You can clean your cast iron pan with soap.