Simon Anderson

@NoContextBrits Lost, because they constantly flew into neighbouring gardens.

@AMAZlNGNATURE Darth

If you had him what would you name him?

Pie Torres #GMSF

I’m gonna give 10 random people that repost this and follow me $25,000 for fun (the $250,000 my X video made) I’ll pick the winners in 72 hours

@crazyclipsonly Blew his shoes off

Man throws a cigarette down a sewer and causes an explosion 😳

Need your help Twitter. A neighbour’s autistic daughter needs a new fire engine. It has to be this and only this one. Mum is desperate. Manufacturer Galey but no longer made. We can do this. Pls retweet.

@wossy Less than the UK spends voting on Britain’s Got Talent.

How much £££ do you think would be needed to start and launch a credible new political party in the UK? Asking for a friend.

@_SalmanAnwar Hotdogs

@HawksmoorLondon @McMoop “Nibbling on a scale unknown to us”

As a British man with a Spanish wife this is a magical few minutes. I can only imagine what everyone would eat over here as standard, and if you think the absurd contempt that drips from this clip will stop me sending it to all my in-laws you are quite wrong 😉 🇬🇧🇪🇸 (via @mcmoop)

@WinoOfMaddox Does it make sense yet?

@JackStein Well done mate.

Saw the article about delays caused by brexit, messaged on Facebook and now we have done a deal to supply our online shop, and when we reopen our restaurants too. It’s hardly sunlit uplands but a good positive story in a very hard time for suppliers bbc.com/news/uk-wales-…

@DowneyJD The simple truth is a large percentage of all deaths were caught either in care homes or hospitals. Hospitality is the smoke screen to hide our governments complete failure to protect the vulnerable and those in its care.

There's an army of idiots on here blaming August's #EatOutToHelpOut for the 100k deaths. Hospitality re-opened on 04 July 2020. We then had 8 great weeks of flat/falling cases. Almost 500m visitors + billions of interactions and no increase in cases. And then schools re-opened.

@elonmusk One of the biggest challenges is bridging the digital divide amongst poor and rich children. Your intelligence, passion and wealth 😀 could help the next Elon not to get lost or left behind in this digital age.

Btw, critical feedback is always super appreciated, as well as ways to donate money that really make a difference (way harder than it seems)

Surely @tesco @sainsburys @AldiUK @LidlGB @Morrisons @waitrose @asda @coopuk can step into help with National Free School meals you've been amazing through lockdown but you have profited as well, why not use those profit to feed your future customers, just think of the goodwill.

@realDonaldTrump ...washing your hair?

To all of those who have asked, I will not be going to the Inauguration on January 20th.

What if all of this is because Boris is trying to avoid his new mother-in-law. Which is weird as they must be about the same age.

@jamestabor I miss read that and thought for a second I had to take my Christmas tree down.

Fucksake does this mean I have to pour it down the drain? 🍾🍾🍾🍾

@JonnElledge Sadly you are assuming anyone other than civil servants and politicians will have jobs to take the day off from in the summer.

Semi serious question - why not announce that we'll get two bank holidays back to back when the pandemic starts to ebb, so people can do replacement Christmas then?

Come on @Hermesparcels admit it you have no advisors? Been waiting 4 days for a parcel to be picked up never mind delivered. Imagine the management meeting - “Do you think we should hire more staff because of lockdown? No we’ll be fine”

Finally an NHS dashboard for checking Covid admissions in your local hospitals- should be very useful to improve transparency and give the public key information Healthcare | Coronavirus in the UK coronavirus.data.gov.uk/details/health…